Sometimes (all the time) having three babies feels unrelenting. There is not fun to be had right now. No dinners out, no Lifetime movie afternoons, no online poker – no being alone in my house -ever. I try to remind myself that this part won’t last forever, that at some point maybe when they’re 40, I will have a little freedom back. The doctor appointments are endless. Last week I took them to their NICU clinic which I’d previously blown off because they see so many doctors as it is that I didn’t want more tests and people assessing them and making me crazy. But the nutritionist said to do it so I did.

Every question the doctor asked about Sadie got a “no” from me.

“Does she indicate for things she wants?”


“Can she get into a sit position?”


“Can she say Mama or Dada to the right person?”

“Um, she can’t really say it at all.”

“Does she bang objects together?”


“Can she roll a ball?”


“Is she pulling to a stand?”

“Okay, now I want to hurt you.”

Yet, magically, Sadie scored well on her tests – although she refused to take a duck out from under a little plastic lid no matter how many times the woman said “Look, Sadie, a duck! Get the duck Sadie! Come on, get the duckie.” Finally I said, “I don’t think Sadie gives two shits about ducks but, hang on. I grabbed a spoon out of her box and replaced the duck with the spoon which Sadie promptly grabbed out with no effort and stuck it in her mouth.

After all the stress she’s only about a month behind her adjusted age for most things. Of course her weight was a concern to everyone but all they had to offer was “Are you adding butter or oil to her food?” Good advice, NICU! If only I’d come here sooner, Sadie would be well on her way to being cast on a Maury Povich big baby show.

Meanwhile Matilda who is a one woman wrecking crew in my house — she’s twenty pounds of pure destruction. She’s already taking steps, can make it out the front door and down the street if you take your eyes off of her for three seconds, eats all finger foods, says mama and daddy…was the worry of her occupational therapist. The reason? Naturally, she would do none of those tricks on command. She looked at the therapist like a dog might eye the UPS guy. She cried and cried. The therapist wanted to know if she’s always like this. “She’s fine” I said. “Seriously, she’s the smartest one in this room. I have no worries. Now why don’t you go have a look at the other 11-months old who is only 13 fucking pounds!”

But in other news, Sadie is scooting all over the house. She is starting physical therapy next week and will be seeing therapists four times a week. Twice with the OT and twice with the PT plus a nutritionist once a month. Plus, her regular pediatrician visits. And my book is still due in a month. So, life is great. Actually, it sort of is! Here’s Sadie saying “As soon as I learn to walk – look out, I’m comin’ for ya!”

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on October 28, 2008 6:39 pmUncategorized23 comments  


  1. Cheryl Lage said,

    Man, I think Sadie rocks…she scoots, she scores if you ask me.

    My faith in her is strong…and lawsy, Mattie is already walking? Dang Girl….that’s early.

    You hang in there…can hardly wait to read your newest.

    Peace and pounds. (Suppose Sadie really can’t have chocolate yet, eh?)

    | October 28, 2008 @ 7:28 pm

  2. Amy in Ohio said,

    Sending good thoughts. Good, calm thoughts.

    | October 28, 2008 @ 7:36 pm

  3. Michelle said,

    Oh that damn NICU follow-up clinic! At the first visit:

    is he rolling over? No
    is he scooting across the floor? No
    is he reaching for things? No
    is he lifting his head up? No

    He is just laying there on his back like a blob.

    All those therapists and specialists firing questions at you like bullets only serve to make you feel like a failure as a parent.

    The nutritionist yelled at me for taking him off the special preemie formula, that he was projectile vomiting anyway.

    I went home and layed in the fetal position, waiting for DFACS to come and take my children from me!

    I think you are doing great! The early intervention is one of the best things you can do for your girls right now to give them the best chance of catching up with their peers.

    | October 28, 2008 @ 8:05 pm

  4. Aunt Becky said,

    Alex is 19 (I’m not sure of this) months old, and he refuses to say “Mama.” Oh yes, he’s a shit head.

    And I keep reminding myself as well that in 10 years, neither of them will want a thing to do with me. Right? RIGHT?!?

    | October 28, 2008 @ 8:39 pm

  5. MereCat said,

    So glad for the update. And I’m also glad to hear that you’re doing well. Sadie’s coming along, just at her own rate. It’s been a tough year for you guys. Hang in there just a little while longer. Twins are hard. Just add preschooler, and poof! All consuming.

    | October 28, 2008 @ 9:23 pm

  6. liz.mccarthy said,

    Hi, I just ran across your blog, and coming from a micropreemie twin mom, I get it! There just isn’t enough time in the day anymore!

    Our first year we had over 250 doctor appointments after being released from the NICU! Yikes!

    | October 28, 2008 @ 10:01 pm

  7. courtney said,

    oh, sweet sweet babies. Sadie’ll get it. She will, she will.

    | October 28, 2008 @ 10:15 pm

  8. Black Hockey Jesus said,

    I’ve been feeling the no fun thing. Work all day. Drive kids to all kinds of lessons all afternoon. Help J. with homework till we pass out. This blows! Hard.

    | October 28, 2008 @ 10:35 pm

  9. Julie said,

    Egad, do you make pretty babies.

    It must be all the butter.

    | October 29, 2008 @ 12:10 am

  10. April said,

    your kids are gorgeous. don’t stress. my oldest didn’t crawl until after 12 mo and didn’t walk until after 18mo. and he had no excuse for it… he was a full term singleton with no complications. just took his time and tried to make me crazy 😉 oh and btw, did i already say, your kids are gorgeous?

    | October 29, 2008 @ 12:19 am

  11. Lisa said,

    I remember going through the NICU follow-up deal. All of those people have such a tendency to repeat themselves. I can’t even guess how many times I was told how much oxygen is in room air.

    | October 29, 2008 @ 1:41 am

  12. Jenny said,

    What a gorgeous girl! I loved the part of your story about replacing the duck with the spoon and how she went right for it. Sounds pretty smart to me! Why go for a duck you really don’t want? Clearly that is a waste of energy. : )

    | October 29, 2008 @ 3:44 am

  13. tammiemarie said,

    I feel for you, girl. I have three littles, and it’s a miracle I haven’t run screaming into the sunset yet. A freakin miracle. No fun. Ever. Did I mention no fun? Hang in there!

    | October 29, 2008 @ 3:46 am

  14. Kyddryn said,

    Go Sadie, go Sadie, go Sadie….

    She looks like she’s working out how to take over the world, preferably next week.

    Meanwhile, like her Mum she’s doing things her way, and the rest of the world can just deal with it.

    Looking forward to the next book…

    Shade and Sweetwater,

    | October 29, 2008 @ 4:31 am

  15. Rebecca said,

    you’re doing everything you can for those girls given their early start in life.

    at our house we just say ahve you ever met a five year old who can’t walk and talk who isn’t really damaged?

    your girls are awesome and they’ll get where they need to go to when they are good and ready i reckon!

    | October 29, 2008 @ 6:12 am

  16. dena said,

    You are such a fortunate woman. Remember these days. Someday they will be gone and you will wish they were small again.

    | October 29, 2008 @ 12:00 pm

  17. Rachael said,

    Sometimes the tests just can’t capture a child and their mind. Sadie is awesome – you see her do so much at home. The only way for them to get a true evaluation would be to live with you. Have faith – you are doing a great job and they are gorgeous!

    | October 30, 2008 @ 3:43 am

  18. June Cleaver said,

    Oh man, I remember those horride NICU follow-up appointments at ginormous academic medical center. We’d go in and pay $50 a pop for the privelage of having our twins sit there with looks on their face like they’re not even aware someone else is in the room. That is unless they’re crying full tilt.

    We didn’t make it past the one year visit. When it was time to schedule our next appointment I said I needed to check our schedule and…ooops…forgot to call to make the appointment. Never once did we get any helpful advice from NICU follow-up. All we did was waste a full day, all my patience and end up with way over stimulated babies who cried for the next 3 hours once we got home.

    I’m a NICU follow-up drop-out

    | October 31, 2008 @ 5:40 am

  19. Lil Mouse said,

    kind of puts my ‘why wont she just breastfeed already’ whines into perspective. sigh. i’m glad you’re coping at least…

    | November 3, 2008 @ 7:14 pm

  20. Candy said,

    Nice to hear the update and thanks so much for the laughs. My girls are 7 months and 20 pounds. I think I’m creating offensive linemen. Their Dad is a football coach, I wonder if he will let them play even though they are girls!

    God help men when they become mobile!

    | November 5, 2008 @ 6:43 pm

  21. Adlibby said,

    So very cute!

    | November 13, 2008 @ 12:12 am

  22. isimsiz said,


    | December 22, 2008 @ 7:55 am

  23. Heather said,

    “Sometimes (all the time) having three babies feels unrelenting. There is not fun to be had right now. No dinners out, no Lifetime movie afternoons, no online poker – no being alone in my house -ever. I try to remind myself that this part won’t last forever, that at some point maybe when they’re 40, I will have a little freedom back.”

    I know you wrote this months ago, but my God, do I know how you feel.

    This is the crazy new stalker of yours who spilled iced tea all over the laptop when I found your blog yesterday. And it did crash, but I was able to take it apart and salvage it. All except for the backspace key that is.

    To answer your question, my twin girls were born in October of this year. I have Charlotte Rose (2 1/2) Josette Laurel and Violet Ann (4 months).

    Ok, baby waking up… gotta run!

    | February 18, 2009 @ 10:06 pm

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