I Need Something New to Complain About

Sadie’s endoscopy went well. I know I was hoping for yeast. But that’s because I’m always hoping for concrete reasons, explanations grounded in medical certainty- basically a diagnosis I can hang my hat on and move on with my life – truthfully move on to another worry. But there was no yeast. My little babe, it turns out, also has a very beautifully shaped stomach (I’ll have to research if there is any need for internal stomach modeling work for infants). So you might think I’d be pulling my hair out right about now shrieking “What is wrong if not yeast? And who finished all the Vicidon I thought I had left over from my friend’s mom’s surgery last year? (oh me)” but I’m not. I’m good. I’m just happy that I don’t have to start her on another harsh medication. The doctor thinks that Sadie is just still suffering from a bit of food aversion (really bottle aversion) from when she did have a raging yeast infection.

One of you readers, Diane, suggested that I try probiotics – and even gave me a specific brand – which I ran out and bought (see, a lot of people feel bad giving advice for some reason when, shit, if I’m blogging this much about it, chances are I’m ready to try anything). I believe it’s working. Sade’s been taking more and more at her feedings and seems less unhappy after she eats.

Okay, so she’s developmentally behind, not on the charts for anything really, but she is growing. And she’s awfully cute. So, I’m going to relax. But that doesn’t mean I will stop constantly complaining – because complaining is almost like my calling card. I do it extremely well, possibly because I’ve been practicing since I was still in diapers. Complaining, if done right, can be fun, harmless and cathartic. In fact, I don’t get on well with Pollyannas. If you can’t find something to complain about, you aren’t trying hard enough. Maybe there are some who find it irritating to be around someone who complains a lot. I find it irritating to be around people who try to find the upside to every single fucking situation. Listen, I may be exaggerating a bit. I don’t constantly complain. I just like to find the flaws and point them out in what I think is an amusing way. On the flip side, I’m quite forgiving of a lot of things like bad service in a restaurant, long lines at the post office and pharmacists who won’t refill my Xanax because it’s two days too early. These things come with the territory of life. Puppet shows where the performers spend 20 minutes telling the kids they must remain quiet and seated at all times, bad movies, many of my neighbors, circuses in general, parades, contractors, my deadline, the fact that it’s tough to get a good bagel in LA these are things I never tire of complaining about.

But, even I’ll admit it’s tough to complain when you’ve got this going on at your house:

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on August 21, 2008 7:43 pmUncategorized40 comments  


  1. Aunt Becky said,

    Complain away if you need to, or don’t if you don’t, I always like to listen.

    Glad Sadie has a gorgeous stomach and that all looks well.

    | August 21, 2008 @ 8:33 pm

  2. Ms Picket To You said,

    And? And she has the most awesome ‘do!

    | August 21, 2008 @ 8:50 pm

  3. Anonymous said,

    I’m so glad you wrote this, because I find that these days with the whole “Secret” phenom there is really not enough complaining going on. And, to make it even more annoying, when I complain people will say super-ridiculous things like “Oh, that’s not using the secret,”

    | August 21, 2008 @ 8:53 pm

  4. Stefanie said,

    Fuck the Secret.

    | August 21, 2008 @ 8:57 pm

  5. surcie said,

    Look at her rockin’ the scrunchie!

    | August 21, 2008 @ 8:58 pm

  6. Becky said,

    I’m something of a complainer myself. My husband and father call me a “pessimist.” Bad stuff is gonna happen, and I’m a downer for talking about it? Whatever. And all those people talking about the bright side. Sometimes it just sucks, people!

    My daughter, though. She can complain better than anyone I know. If only she could learn to be funny about it…

    | August 21, 2008 @ 8:59 pm

  7. Catwoman said,

    What’s the point of having a blog if you don’t use it to complain?

    And holy crap is Sadie ever freaking cute! She’s just passionate about great things come in small packages, that’s all.

    | August 21, 2008 @ 9:10 pm

  8. Jamie said,

    I am with you. My husband calls me a pessimest; however, I prefer the term, realist. Sometimes,bad things happen and life can just suck big time. It needs to be totally ok to bitch about it.

    She is working the hair – and glad she has a model perfect tummy.

    | August 21, 2008 @ 9:12 pm

  9. giggleblue said,

    omg! she is getting bigger!!!!! i’m happy that the probiotics are working for her.

    | August 21, 2008 @ 9:20 pm

  10. Stefanie said,

    Okay, miss ponytail is not Sadie. That’s Mattie. I better put one up of Sadie or else it’s false advertising.

    | August 21, 2008 @ 9:21 pm

  11. Sandra said,

    I’m glad her procedure went well. I agree, it would be nice to put a name to her condition.

    I love complainers. When you all complain then my complaining is justified too. :0)

    | August 21, 2008 @ 9:39 pm

  12. Middle Aged Woman said,

    “Damn, them are some cute babyuns you got there, Missie,” she said, lapsing into a heretofore unknown southern accent. Bitching and moaning, when funny, is always welcome. What better stress reliever?

    | August 21, 2008 @ 9:40 pm

  13. Putty said,

    I was an internal stomach model for a time in the late nineties, when the industry was still into the natural look. Some said I would be a superstar, but the stress of being in tiptop internal stomach shape led to ulcers and eventually derailed my career. Now I do some internal stomach shows at state fairs and auto dealerships openings, but I am virtually invisible in my everyday life and it is a rare treat when someone walks up to me and says, “I recognize that Gastric Canal. You used to be big time.” The thrill is quickly replaced by sadness when I see the look of pity in their eye. Shooting star, my friends.

    | August 21, 2008 @ 10:16 pm

  14. heather... said,

    Dude, I saw Sadie like a week ago and she already looks bigger. WTF, are you feeding her bricks?

    | August 21, 2008 @ 11:05 pm

  15. MereCat said,

    Those are some ADORABLE babes!

    Here’s a nice kvetch to pitch at you… how do you like your mini-van? Didn’t you get one? I remember an old post of yours that was something like, “Can anyone give me an alternative to the mini-van?” What ever happened about that? I want to know if that rant became a rave, or if it still feels rather un-MILF-y. I am looking for a car, and it looks like I’m mini-van bound. And I am bitching ALL THE WAY.

    | August 21, 2008 @ 11:36 pm

  16. sarah said,

    Check out Sadie rocking the aqua-blue scrunchie! She is so retro.

    Complaining is a skill I am learning to perfect here in L.A. The opportunities are endless…

    | August 22, 2008 @ 12:31 am

  17. sarah said,

    again, I need to read the comments before submitting my own.

    Not only did I inadvertently copy Surcie’s comment, I called retro-scrunchie baby Sadie when you clearly stated that she’s Mattie. Sigh.

    I am comment-challenged.

    | August 22, 2008 @ 12:33 am

  18. Cheryl Lage said,

    Those are some marvelously meaty-looking girls…both of ’em!

    Rock the probiotics…if it’s working, roll with it! 🙂

    | August 22, 2008 @ 2:23 am

  19. www.startswithanx.com said,

    What the hell IS the secret?

    Complain away, sister. Isn’t that what these things are for?

    | August 22, 2008 @ 3:11 am

  20. Willow said,

    Please, never stop compalining – it’s good for us all!

    Glad things seem to be going well with Sadie. Everything crossed that it stays that way.

    | August 22, 2008 @ 3:58 am

  21. Willow said,

    Oops! *complaining* I really should proof read occasionally.

    | August 22, 2008 @ 3:59 am

  22. Ms. Bar B: said,

    LMAO @ fuck the Secret.

    Why the hell is The Secret the first thing people throw at you these days. I swear, in a minute, therapists are gonna start taking away the drugs and prescribing The Secret!!

    Complain away… its better to get it out than to keep it bottled up inside and besides… everyone wants to hear =)

    | August 22, 2008 @ 4:28 am

  23. Anonymous said,

    Question: who is who in the picture? They seem the same size to me. A good thing, right?

    Read up on the psychological concept called mood contagion and then think about complaining and its impact.

    | August 22, 2008 @ 5:31 am

  24. June Cleaver said,

    Wow, I think both girls look great. I don’t really see that much of a size difference but it may just be the way the picture was taken.

    I’m glad to hear Ms Sadie is eating a bit more for you. I know how stressful it can be worrying over ever 1/4 ounce that you can get into them. I think Madeline ate 14 ounces her entire first year. Not per day. 14 ounces the entire year. Ben, on the other hand, would suck the bottle out of your hand and, if he was still hungry when he was done, you’d better have more ready or there’d be hell to pay.

    Now they’re 3. Ben will eat jelly bread, mac and cheese and plain pasta. Oh, he did eat a couple steamed shrimp tonight. Madeline will eat the wallpaper. She will eat anything except real whipped cream. I mean anything. Clam chowder, dill pickles, steamed crabs, deviled eggs, lightbulbs (that last one would be funnhy if she didn’t actually take a bite of a christmas bulb last year).

    I hoep Sadie continues to improve her eating for you. As long as she’s gaining, you’re doing good.

    | August 22, 2008 @ 6:00 am

  25. Rhonda said,

    They are both looking like delicious chunky monkeys!

    | August 22, 2008 @ 1:06 pm

  26. Diane said,

    I am so glad the probiotics seem to be helping. They are both stinkin’ cute! The pony tail is fantastic!

    Complain away. I like to call it venting. It is very therapeutic for me. I should know…I’m a therapist. (who has never read the Secret! They didn’t teach that in grad school!)

    | August 22, 2008 @ 2:20 pm

  27. CaraBee said,

    Oh, that hair is too cute! They both look baby chunky to me, what’s with this skinny business?

    | August 22, 2008 @ 6:57 pm

  28. Gwendolyn Peregrine said,

    Has Sadie ever had allergy testing? After 11 months of my baby never being on the charts, I finally demanded it and, whoops, what do you know, she has a severe milk allergy. Sorry about that.

    She’s doing better; still small though even on soy. I guess I’m back to “no one knows why my baby doesn’t gain weight” again. It sucks.

    | August 22, 2008 @ 7:19 pm

  29. thotlady said,

    I agree about the complaining logic.

    I come from a long line of complainers. It is a form of recreation in my family. If you are not complaining you are dead or seriously incapacitated

    My husband doesn’t subscribe to the same philosophy. He is not as fond of my complaining as my family is. Too bad.

    Your daughters are very sweet. You are very lucky in spite of Sadie’s trials.

    | August 22, 2008 @ 7:58 pm

  30. pixiemama said,

    OMG! Chrysler Pacifica! If you don’t want a minivan, get a Pacifica. I pay through the nose for mine each and every month, but it fits us all (four kids! two adults!) comfortably, it doesn’t LOOK like a minivan and it drives like a fun car. We bought ours used, and it is totally maxed out. Sunroof, Siruis radio, in-dash navigation, heated seats (love.love.love. those!)

    Best part? Husband is stuck driving the minivan he picked out for me against my will. hahahahahahaha

    Next best part? If you bought a minivan, you can b*tch that it isn’t my Pacifica! (**please don’t hate me**)

    PS Excellent news on the probiotics. Mighty little creatures, they are!

    | August 22, 2008 @ 8:35 pm

  31. Mike said,

    You know who I hate? People who don’t complain and love EVERYTHING!!! You know, the people who won’t even complain about people who complain!

    | August 22, 2008 @ 8:51 pm

  32. Overflowing Brain said,

    Complaining can’t be your calling card, I’ve already trademarked it. Not really, but I probably should. Someone should be benefitting from my bitching.

    Those are 2 beautiful blue eyed kids there, by the way. I can’t imagine how tough it must be to not be in control of this stuff, but if it means anything, I think you’re doing a damn fine job at it.

    | August 22, 2008 @ 10:19 pm

  33. Undomestic Diva said,

    Honestly, sometimes, backing off and worrying less (not easy to do, I know) helps more than stressing over it. Trust your intuition. She looks amazing.

    | August 23, 2008 @ 10:06 pm

  34. RhoRho said,

    Cuteness. and , Amen, sister, re: all the Pollyannas.

    | August 24, 2008 @ 4:19 am

  35. Carolyn...Online said,

    I think Mattie crossed her arms in front of her, blinked her eyes while doing a quick headbang with the ponytail atop the head, and made a Genie wish for her sister. That’s what I think.

    | August 24, 2008 @ 1:16 pm

  36. WA said,

    “my friend’s mother’s Vicodin”…love it.

    | August 24, 2008 @ 8:10 pm

  37. andreaaskowitz.com said,

    I too love a good complaint, which is why I wrote My Miserable, Lonely, Lesbian Pregnancy, because my pregnancy sucked. But get this. My girlfriend is now pregnant and at first she was pregnant with twins (before one of them melted away somehow and that was very sad) but before that I was jealous. I was thinking: Shit, she’ll be complaining for the rest of our lives and her complaining will always beat my complaining, I was merely pregnant with one.

    | August 25, 2008 @ 2:41 am

  38. Piccinigirl said,

    I have serious issues with the “secret” and have it banished it from conversations and find reasons to complain about something in every day life. What’s the fun in not finding anything WRONG once a day?

    your girls are gorgeous!!!!

    | August 25, 2008 @ 4:36 pm

  39. help4newmoms said,

    Gosh, those babies are soooo cute!

    | August 27, 2008 @ 12:41 am

  40. sesi said,


    | December 22, 2008 @ 8:01 am

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