Hey, Why Won’t You Stalk Me?

This is the kind of thing I was into doing when I first got AOL. People would IM me and I’d get super excited. Weirdly, I eventually met my husband this way. This, however, is not my husband:

CalSCUf: Hey there, how old are you?
LazloStef: How old are you hot stuff?
CalSCUf: 25
LazloStef: Sounds excellent to me.
CalSCUf: so u?
LazloStef: What are your hobbies?
CalSCUf: baseball, beer, movies
LazloStef: Oh, okay. I thinks we’ve got ourselves a match. I love movies too!
CalSCUf: guess so, u like beer and baseball too?
LazloStef: Mostly I drink Chablis. Chilled.
LazloStef: I used to enjoy a malt liquor or two when I was a bit younger.
CalSCUf: ok, ok, now u gotta tell me, ….how old are you?
LazloStef: I’m 57 years young.
CalSCUf: oh man
LazloStef: If I’m not I’ll eat my hat!
CalSCUf: at least u could be an angels fan
LazloStef: So do you want to come over and bone? KIDDING! But seriously though, would you enjoy viewing some television with me?
CalSCUf: do u have a pic?
LazloStef: what does that mean? pic?
CalSCUf: picture?
LazloStef: I have a picture of my grandkids. Would you like to see it? I’ll show you when you get here.
CalSCUf: no thanks, do u have any pics of Troy Glaus or Darrin Erstad?
LazloStef: I have a picture of Helen of Troy but it’s a reproduction.
LazloStef: would you like to trade?
LazloStef: hello?

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on August 27, 2008 5:24 pmUncategorized20 comments  


  1. Marinka said,

    I would so be over! That Helen of Troy was a real ship launcher.

    | August 27, 2008 @ 5:39 pm

  2. LiteralDan said,

    I was having some messed up conversations online 10 years ago, too. I like to leave people scratching their heads.

    And I also accidentally met my wife online.

    | August 27, 2008 @ 6:00 pm

  3. CP said,

    I met MY husband on AOL as well- a chat room called “A Room with a View”. We lie and tell people we met skiing (1st date, actually). Today is our 14th anniversary so I guess it worked out fine.

    AOL was the source of many many weird conversations.

    | August 27, 2008 @ 6:16 pm

  4. Jennifer and Sandi said,

    Hahahhaha that’s hysterical. HELLO HELLO !! Where did you go??? I can just see it now! Too Funny!


    – Jennifer

    | August 27, 2008 @ 6:27 pm

  5. Backpacking Dad said,

    That entire conversation is an utter fabrication.

    I have never asked you for pictures of Troy Glaus.

    And I never asked “how old are you?” I’m classy. A/S/L please.

    More seriously, I, like everyone else here apparently, met my spouse online in a chatroom. Back in the 90s. Remember the 90s? Oasis was Wonderwalling and Windows was 95ing.

    | August 27, 2008 @ 6:37 pm

  6. Immoral Matriarch said,

    I spit Dr. Pepper all over my keyboard @ LazloStef: So do you want to come over and bone?


    | August 27, 2008 @ 7:06 pm

  7. Piccinigirl said,

    yep, that giggle will keep me from crying today.

    | August 27, 2008 @ 7:19 pm

  8. Aunt Becky said,

    That was one hell of a hot conversation. I’m breathless and need a moment to myself now. IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

    | August 27, 2008 @ 7:25 pm

  9. Y said,


    | August 27, 2008 @ 7:48 pm

  10. Carolyn...Online said,

    I didn’t get the conversation. I don’t think I speak 90’s AOL. But I will totally stalk you in any other fashion you find appropriate.

    | August 27, 2008 @ 7:54 pm

  11. Surcie said,

    I met my husband 14 years ago via chatroom. Oy.

    | August 27, 2008 @ 8:23 pm

  12. Lisa said,

    I used to mess with the guys that would IM on AOL as well. My personal favorite would be to chat for a bit and then say “BRB. That enchilada I had for lunch REALLY didn’t agree with me.”

    Such a nasty visual but it was surprising how many still wanted to chat.

    | August 27, 2008 @ 8:38 pm

  13. Ms. Bar B: said,

    Very “To Catch A Preditor”. Lol

    | August 27, 2008 @ 9:02 pm

  14. heather... said,

    If you had a picture of you and Troy Glaus together…well, there would be no stopping me. I’d be on your doorstep with my laptop backpack on…and nothing else.

    | August 27, 2008 @ 9:12 pm

  15. Sleep Deprivation Ninja said,

    I’ll trade you a picture of the grand ninja master for that pic of Helen of Troy… of course, my photo photo of the master is just black…

    | August 27, 2008 @ 10:12 pm

  16. Sharon said,

    OMG – that made me laugh out loud and at the end of the day I had today, I needed it!

    | August 27, 2008 @ 11:40 pm

  17. Mommy Melee said,

    I’m forever grateful to AIM for giving my husband the courage to approach me since evidently he couldn’t manage to do so before, during, or after the class we had together freshman year of college.

    Other than that it’s mostly a big cockup. But good for the LOLs.

    Also good for the LOLs = You.

    | August 28, 2008 @ 12:22 am

  18. MereCat said,

    *snort* Loved it.

    | August 28, 2008 @ 1:36 am

  19. WickedStepMom said,

    I am scared because I think I was doing the same thing you were on AOL… Maybe we even talked to eachtoher… I loved trying to freak people out like that.

    | August 28, 2008 @ 2:33 pm

  20. alperen said,


    | December 22, 2008 @ 8:01 am

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