Dimitri the Lover

Baby On Bored is all about learning. Learning from our mistakes and learning through other’s mistakes.

My mission, and I do have one, is to create peace and harmony throughout the world. To bring people with common goals together – as one. And sometimes, the way to really come together and promote change is to form a united front against an evil. An evil that if we were to fight alone, we couldn’t but together, together we can fight – in this case by laughing at this douchebag.


Please come back and tell me your favorite line! I have so many!

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on July 2, 2008 9:48 pmUncategorized33 comments  


  1. heather said,

    God DAMN IT! Mike SWORE to me he’s stop this once we were married! That son of a bitch.

    | July 2, 2008 @ 10:13 pm

  2. Elise said,

    OH my goodness, where did you find this? And WHY did you blank out his number? I am sooooo interested. I don’t know if you were listening, but HE IS ONE OF THE ONLY MEN IN THE CITY WITH NO PROBLEMS! He’s a catch! Dimitri! CALL ME!

    | July 2, 2008 @ 10:56 pm

  3. Kia said,

    LOL!!! This is hilarious! What’s funniest is that the phone number he gives 416-….. is from the same area code as where I live!!! I NEED to find him. hahahahahha

    | July 2, 2008 @ 11:08 pm

  4. Katie said,

    Here is his website:


    Found via:


    | July 3, 2008 @ 12:25 am

  5. margalit said,

    So many good lines. I love the “giving you an opportunity”… but that’s just one of many.

    | July 3, 2008 @ 12:39 am

  6. Tiffany said,

    “I’m a complete catch.”

    Wow how humble! If she doesn’t take him I will!

    | July 3, 2008 @ 12:40 am

  7. Ms Picket To You said,

    somebody sent this to me and i thought she knew this dude. i was all, get a farking restraining order ASAP, stop messing with match.com, yada yada yada. then she politely explained the origin and naturally, i felt like an ass. because I am “elegant” that way.

    | July 3, 2008 @ 12:44 am

  8. Baby B said,

    That is horrifyingly hilarious or hilariously horrifying, I can’t decide which.

    That guy takes booty call as business call to a new level of awful.

    | July 3, 2008 @ 1:24 am

  9. Pearl said,

    I appreciate that he identifies himself as “the guy from the street.” Oh, you mean the one with the paper cup trying to sell me his toenail clippings?

    Second runner up: “I am completely single.” As opposed to partially single?

    | July 3, 2008 @ 1:37 am

  10. SUEB0B said,

    Oh, I LOVE me some Dmitri. I am still hoping he will call me back someday.

    | July 3, 2008 @ 2:16 am

  11. Lori said,

    “You should look up Passive Aggressive disorder.” Priceless.

    | July 3, 2008 @ 3:01 am

  12. Black Hockey Jesus said,

    “You’re playing games like you see on stupid TV shows so here’s how it’s gonna work.”

    “I don’t date timid women.”

    | July 3, 2008 @ 3:27 am

  13. Bree said,

    “If you’re psychologically normal then give me a call”

    OR (and I paraphrase)

    ‘If your mother has cancer then I forgive you and you can still give me a call.”

    I can’t believe this asshole is from Toronto. I’m embarrassed for my fellow Canadians.

    | July 3, 2008 @ 3:55 am

  14. Kari said,

    I wish I were elegant enough to attract winners like that.

    This is from DListed:

    Is Elegant Olga’s douchetastic voicemail stalker the infamous “Dimitri the Lover” from Toronto? After I posted Dimitri’s douche-rant to Elegant Olga, a bunch of you sent me links to articles and websites about Dimitri the Lover.

    Dimitri the Lover was in local papers in Toronto a while ago after he was stripped of his medical license for sexually assaulting patients. Yes, he used to be a doctor. His explanation was, “At the time, I was married. And my wife was sexually dysfunctional, I had not had sex with her in a year and a half. It was a very tough time, I was very horned up. And I was busy, between that and working, so for me it was easy to hit on chicks that were patients.”

    He’s pretty well known in Toronto for being the biggest douche alive. He’s also part of a group known as Toronto Real Men. It sounds like a circle jerk group. Toronto Real Men is part of the “seduction community.” I guess, they try and f*** as many chicks as they can.

    There’s a lot more info on Dimitri the Lover’s website as well as this interview he did. There’s also a super small picture of him here:


    | July 3, 2008 @ 4:00 am

  15. Gwendolyn Peregrine said,

    As a matter of fact, I’m one of the FEW men in the city who has nothing wrong with him!

    | July 3, 2008 @ 4:03 am

  16. Jenée said,

    My favorite line from Dimitri is the one that was apparently edited out: “I’m a raging homo.” And I don’t mean to offend the gays by saying that but I can tell by his voice that this guy’s as queer as a three dollar rim job from Richard Simmons.

    | July 3, 2008 @ 6:06 am

  17. Backpacking Dad said,

    Best pickup line ever: “Maybe you were abused…maybe your mother has cancer.”

    How do the ladies stay away?

    | July 3, 2008 @ 8:02 am

  18. Carolyn...Online said,

    How can anyone doubt Dimitri the over aggressive psychotic’s love for the elegant lady?

    | July 3, 2008 @ 11:34 am

  19. Anna Marie said,

    “You shouldactually look that up – “Passive-Aggressive Personality Disorder…”

    Dear God I am laughing so hard I can’t breathe.

    “You call me as soon as you have the courage to…”

    And this guy is still single???

    | July 3, 2008 @ 1:31 pm

  20. just4ofus said,

    My favorite line: “there is nothing wrong with me”.
    Clearly there isn ‘t.
    Maybe he should look up the term: narcissistic.

    | July 3, 2008 @ 1:41 pm

  21. Catwoman said,

    Worst part is (besides the fact that he’s Canadian, which how did THAT HAPPEN???? So mortifying that he’s representing us with his psycho-ness (yes, that’s a word) ) that the freak gives other men seminar so that they too can (and I’m quoting here from what I heard on the radio) “enslave” women. Someone needs to check this dude’s basement for imprisonned love slaves muy pronto!

    Cracks me up that he tells her “I know all of your friends are jealous.” Of course they are. But only because they’re wishing that they could have posted about his psychoness on the Internet.

    | July 3, 2008 @ 2:38 pm

  22. Catwoman said,

    Oh, also… Another tidbit I got from the radio on this guy. Apparently he was fired from his job at the government because he’d uhm… pleasure himself 6-7 times a day.

    And when confronted about it, he said he had to let the stress out.

    | July 3, 2008 @ 2:40 pm

  23. Becky said,

    Oh wow… just… wow. So hilarious! Thanks for sharing!
    😀 Becky

    | July 3, 2008 @ 3:29 pm

  24. Jennifer said,

    Wow–it’s hard to choose!

    I enjoyed “Now here’s the way I work: I don’t like leaving second messages.”

    And I also loved the 3:00 deadline–that was priceless!!

    | July 4, 2008 @ 4:50 am

  25. The Wrath of Dawn said,

    My favourite part was, “… don’t call me.”

    Okay. I think I can just about manage that.


    | July 6, 2008 @ 9:41 pm

  26. M. said,

    This guy sounds like my father.
    Who looks like George Bush.

    Yeah, I’ve got deep psychological issues. But only w/ guys like this.

    | July 7, 2008 @ 9:02 pm

  27. Becca said,

    My favorite part is how he leaves his life’s story on Olga’s message machine. Or maybe it’s how he attempts to diagnose her passive aggressive tendencies and anxiety resulting from an abusive childhood. Actually, no. My favorite part is how he emphasizes just how desirable he is but gets so bitter when this one girl doesn’t call him back. I mean, why should he be so upset? He gets approached by six or seven women a day! He’s a COMPLETE CATCH!

    | July 7, 2008 @ 10:45 pm

  28. M. said,


    I read your comment too quickly, missed the first ‘or’ and got:

    “his life’s story” – “passive aggressive tendencies and anxiety resulting from an abusive childhood.”

    Would love to hear the stories of these 6-7 women / day who approach him. Does he work as a toll-taker and these are the women who look him in the eye in a day’s work?

    | July 8, 2008 @ 6:03 am

  29. merlotmom said,

    I’m shocked this is real! I thought it was some actor, some scripted thing, you know like those crank calls on comedy central? I wanna punch this guy in his perfectly, round, fertile testicles.

    | July 8, 2008 @ 6:23 am

  30. SickofDimitri said,

    This LOSER approached me as well on King street near George BRown college Campus. He is a SICK, Perverted asshole who preys on women and makes explicit sexual advances. He stopped me as I was walking on the street and propositioned sex within 2 minutes of the conversation, as soon as I caught on, I held my vomit and told him to f himself. what a pathetic excuse of a man. He should be behind bars with his sexual assault record. where is there justice?

    | July 9, 2008 @ 1:51 am

  31. M. said,

    @sickof, justice would have its hands full trying to crack down on this guy w/o making it illegal for anyone to approach anyone else, ever. As long as twerpy perp doesn’t physically force a woman to do anything, he flies under the radar.

    Maybe this viral is justice. It’s brought out a lot more IRL stories like yours, and is forewarning the women who haven’t heard of him.

    Here’s the video he uses to advertise his trainings:
    NOT family-friendly, NOT work-friendly, it might make you vomit for real. Looks like Olga got the Lite version of his deal.

    | July 9, 2008 @ 8:35 am

  32. mattyu said,

    i uploaded the radio interview from his website for your convenience 🙂

    | July 29, 2008 @ 7:25 am

  33. Laurie said,

    This guy tried to pick me up today just west of Dominions on Bloor (in the Annex)! I knew who he was though, having read about him previously and seen his photo. He was pretty sleezy – his first words were “excuse me, are you single?” in a slow sultry tone. As I said no and walked away as yelled after me an emphatic “you’re beautiful!”

    | August 4, 2008 @ 12:41 am

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