It’s Embarrassing But the Belly is Posted

I’m thirty + weeks and counting down. Mostly I’m concentrating on making these babies grow. Grow babies grow! I cannot tell you how awful it is when people constantly tell me how small I look (in the belly). They ask, “how far along are you?” and before I even say I’m having twins (which I’ve pretty much stopped doing) I tell them the weeks and they look at me like they’re horrified. But really, I think soon the smaller babe will just start pulling nutrients out of my ass. A girl can dream right? I am going to admit something to you guys (as if you couldn’t tell how neurotic I am anyway). You know how I post about being scared of getting weighed at the doctor? Obviously this weight issue goes way back to junior high school when I decided I was fat despite the fact that I was perfectly normal with a curvy Jewish rear end that I deemed unacceptable. Unhealthy food and eating disorder issues ensued. I don’t need to tell any of my female readers that those issues had way more to do with many other issues having nothing to do with weight and everything to do with lack of control over the rest of my life. Those issues have been under control since I was in my early twenties. But, having someone actively monitoring my weight really brings the old obsession right up to the forefront. Don’t get me wrong, I eat a ton, and I’m taking care of these girls like a crazy protective mama already – it just comes out in my worry about getting weighed. Full disclosure: I don’t own a scale so I weighed myself at Bed, Bath and Beyond so that I wouldn’t be surprised at my appointment this morning. Yes, that’s completely over the top redonkulous and not my proudest moment. I know some of you who don’t have this issue will read this and find it self indulgant and strange but it feels real to me. Plus, I’m pretty hormonal so…cut me some slack.
I’m feeling a lot better about the disparate weight of the babies and I’m downing a Carnation Instant Breakfast drink every morning. They seems to like that. Especially the chocolate flavor.

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on November 2, 2007 4:07 pmUncategorized23 comments  


  1. momomax said,

    it’s good to see you! you won’t believe me, but you look great. your little girl is adorable. happy halloween.

    | November 2, 2007 @ 5:19 pm

  2. Erica said,

    Gosh, weight issues = bleah. I feel for you.

    I know one women who had a baby the same time I did and you couldn’t even tell she was pregnant the whole 9 months due to the way the baby lied. She still had a perfectly healthy baby.

    | November 2, 2007 @ 5:42 pm

  3. Becky said,

    You look perfect. I think you look beautiful.

    | November 2, 2007 @ 6:12 pm

  4. Suzy said,

    Once I was at my Dad’s and he didn’t have a lot of food in the house but he had a LOT of Ensure. I didn’t bother to read the label so I started drinking them and at the end of the week with him I’d put on 3 pounds. I asked my Dad what was in them and he said his doctor recommended them to him for weight gain. The elderly lose nutrients and weight faster than anyone so he was drinking one a day. I was having TWO.

    | November 2, 2007 @ 6:24 pm

  5. andi said,

    You look awesome! It seems like no matter what we do, we’re damned if we do and damned if we don’t. Either you’re glared at or comments are made because you’re “huge” while pregnant, or people remark that you’re too small.

    I was “small” with both babies and always had people ask me if I was sure the baby was okay (like I wasn’t going to the doctor and checking, sheesh!) One baby was 7lbs 8 oz and the other was 7lbs 15 oz.

    I’m sure that you and the wee ones will be just fine. You look fabulous.

    | November 2, 2007 @ 6:37 pm

  6. JP said,

    De-lurking ONLY to tell you that those Carnation breakfast-things (the powder) is an excellent addition to making smoothies…or milkshakes. Whichever the babies prefer. 🙂

    | November 2, 2007 @ 8:11 pm

  7. gmcountrymama said,

    You guys are sooo cute! I am glad you are feeling better.

    | November 3, 2007 @ 12:31 am

  8. Stephanie said,

    You look beautiful! Dont listen to anything anyone but your doctor has to say – they know what they’re talking about a lot more than random people on the street.
    I had people commenting during my pregnancy last year about how I was too small (and still get them about how my 5 month old is too small) but the doctor said/says we’re perfectly healthy and that is all that matters!

    A longtime reader, first time commenter

    | November 3, 2007 @ 2:44 am

  9. "Crafty Susan" said,

    wanna hear crazy? when I was pregnant with Eli I would weigh myself before my OB appointment and I would change into lighter weight clothes if I wasn’t happy with the number on the scale. God, I can’t believe I just admitted that. Sad. But true.

    And I LOVED carnation instant breakfast. It was one of 3 things I could keep down in the beginning.

    They will be fine. I just know it.

    | November 3, 2007 @ 5:42 am

  10. Laural Dawn said,

    You look amazing!
    You’re a pretty tiny woman, so I don’t think it’s realistic to expect to gain tons. I gained 80+ lbs with my son, and maybe 20 lb of that was baby weight. I know it’s more for twins, but don’t sweat it.
    I think people say you are small as a compliment. If I said that I would mean it as a total compliment.
    As for the weight thing – I get that completely.
    I hate being weighed even though I know it’s good. I’m also paranoid of gaining too much weight – and panic when I gain a pound (I’m still in 2nd trimester, so I don’t even know what is normal).
    If it makes you feel better, my scale seemed wrong to me and I went and weighed myself at Sears in their bathroom section 🙂

    PS The other day my company’s HR person said that I wasn’t gaining enough weight – I actually started to laugh. I’ve never been told that in my life!

    | November 3, 2007 @ 3:12 pm

  11. Daisy said,

    You and Your doctor know what’s right for the babies. Those others? Nasty people to make personal comments. Your little ones will be healthy and perfect.

    | November 3, 2007 @ 3:43 pm

  12. Cheryl Lage said,

    Omigosh Ms. Stef, you look uber-fab! 30+ and rockin the baby-growth, Girl! Everyone told me I looked too small for twins too, and as I sit typing this, our no 6-year-old twins are healthily devouring candy corn…

    Feel better about B, B and B weigh in…as a gal who to this day (if my kids aren’t in tow) cannot pass one of those God-awful electronic scales in front of the GNC without dropping in the double quarters and taking off my shoes and jacket first (to lighten the load) mid-mall, you’re not alone.

    Thanks for posting, been thinking about you daily—keep us updated, and your feet up as best you can.

    Good news, post twins, through NO concerted effort on my part

    | November 3, 2007 @ 7:49 pm

  13. Cheryl Lage said,

    the twin maintenance (+ Elby in your case) unstructured exercise keeps the weight in check.

    (of course the chocolate induced spasm that had me hit “post” prematurely, cannot be such a good thing…)

    Do they still make that Carnation Instant Breakfast in Chocolate Peanut Butter? mmmmmm….

    | November 3, 2007 @ 7:53 pm

  14. dana said,

    I think you look adorable! 🙂

    | November 3, 2007 @ 11:33 pm

  15. Candace said,

    ugh! no matter what anyone says it always taps into our own shit. Even after my kids were born. “wow, he’s small for a 6 month old.” and I would spiral, he’s got reflux, failure to thrive, etc,etc.(which he did but he’s fine)
    the worst was when someone said to me ironically at Bed, Bath and Beyond,…”geez! how many you got in there?”
    You look insanely beautiful not that my opinion changes how you feel inside but you do. And you are a great mama taking care of those lucky babes! I’m excited for you and your family. Let the games begin…….
    I have a theory that just when you feel like you’ve got some sort of handle on life it’s time to F it all up again and what better way to do that than with 2 babies!

    | November 4, 2007 @ 12:49 am

  16. Surcie said,

    Those people can take their shock and shove it. You’re doing everything right–nothing to be embarassed about.

    | November 4, 2007 @ 1:55 am

  17. Jellybean said,

    Okay. When I was pregnant with my twins, no one thought I was pregnant with twins until, umm, 38 weeks. Honest. Needless to say, I felt huge long before that. You look great. And chic. (Oh no. I just remembered that one of my cousins expressed surprise that I could still fit behind the wheel of the car. Ouch. That might still hurt.)

    I remember one mass weigh-in session at my OB’s where every other woman stepped on the scale and had gained, like, 2 lbs. Then there was me. Let’s just say the number was much bigger than 2. Much.

    | November 4, 2007 @ 10:21 pm

  18. Mom101 said,

    I think you look appropriately big in the belly and decidedly non-Jewish in the tuchus. Enjoy the extra calories while you can. Who doesn’t want an excuse to eat chocolate? (And glad to see the update.)

    | November 5, 2007 @ 4:32 am

  19. Catwoman said,

    In case the other 18 comments didn’t convince you, I think you look fantastic. Everyone gains weight differently and as long as your doctor’s not concerned, then you have nothing to be concerned about and screw the obnoxious people with their comments.

    I? Was told “check out the fat lady!” and “you are so HUGE!” by one of my mother-in-law’s friends. She’d be dead, but luckily for her, I’d accompanied my m-i-l to Church for mother’s day. It seemed wrong to kill someone in a house of God.

    Oh, and I’d weigh myself in the morning naked before any food (and after I pooped, of course) during my entire pregnancy, so that I didn’t have to do it at my midwife’s office with food in me and clothes on during my last pregnancy. We all have issues.

    | November 5, 2007 @ 8:04 pm

  20. AmyD said,

    You look flipping adorable, if that’s any consolation.

    And maybe I’m weird, too, but I didn’t think there was one “strange or unwarranted” worry in this post. *GASP* You’re HUMAN! Glad we have another among us, frankly. ;o)

    Take care of you. The babies will follow.

    | November 5, 2007 @ 8:44 pm

  21. whatthef*ck said,

    i bought that skeleton with pink tiara shirt for my daughter in every size and two in XS. i heart that shirt. screw halloween, that is everyday wear. i want one.

    | November 6, 2007 @ 6:38 pm

  22. Naomi (Urban Mummy) said,

    You look just fine! People will always find something to comment on…try not to let it worry you! (ha!)

    | November 7, 2007 @ 3:01 am

  23. Anonymous said,

    Don’t worry about the idiotic comments about being too small for your stage of pregnancy. People can be such jerks to pregnant women. if they’re not gloating over the coming horrors of childbirth they’re telling you some awful story about a distant relative/former neighbor/acquaintance who “carried small, like you” and had a two-headed microscopic circus freak baby.
    I had one woman at the grocery store tell me my baby was probably going to be “retarded” because i didn’t look seven months pregnant. I was scared to death but the baby is now a freshman at Dartmouth. Ignore the thoughtless comments and don’t worry.

    | November 15, 2007 @ 5:07 pm

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