Archive for June, 2006

The Job Hunt is On! Oh Yeah, It’s On!

Time for another bloggy blog. Sometimes I get lazy. I don’t know if you’ve noticed that. I’m not one of those every day bloggers god bless ’em. Maybe I don’t have as much to say. Maybe I’m lazy. It’s certainly not because I’m waaay to busy working on my clay models of Kelly Clarkson.. Every get drunk during the day just because? Yeah, me neither. Do you ever wash down a couple of Tylenol with a swig of Pinot Grigio? Me neither. That would be a cry for help! Speaking of cries for help, my bank account is all “hey when are you going to feed me? I know you have a cute little child that loves having all your attention but my numbers are getting soooo low :(” To be fair, my bank account would never be so uncool as to do a sad face emoticon but you get the point. So, to placate my bank account because I’m such a pushover and I don’t think in LA the one income thing works as well as possibly other areas of the country even is said one income is decent, I’ve been going on some job interviews. Job interviews are weird cause you can never really be honest. No one wants to hear after they ask “Tell me a few of your weaknesses,” you responding “Well, sometimes I tend to take things that don’t belong to me. Like the rest of a co-workers birthday cake or a Xerox machine. Hmm…also, not much of a team player. I find most people to be quite in adept at doing their jobs, and I tend to need constant supervision. If you’re not keeping a sharp eye on me, I’ll probably just be fucking around on the internet or making long distance phone calls.”

“Okay, what about your strenghts?” “Oh! Well, number one – I’m very very sexy. Number two, I’m never afraid to leave a job at the spur of the moment for another job with less hours. Oh and I can really hold my liquor. Hey, you wouldn’t know it but I’m drunk right now!”

So, that style of interview wouldn’t exactly guarantee you the job. You have to be all “I’m a perfectionist….blah blah blah. I love nothing more than working an 80 hour week! I’ve never made love to an animal….Come on!

This is why I don’t go on a lot of interviews. Luckily in my field I can afford to be a been more irreverant all in the name of “I’m joking around.”

I’ll keep you posted on when and if I get a job. I’ve had many interviews but nothing firm as of yet. I’ll hate to leave my baby at home but then again, she’s not a baby anymore. She can say NO just like the rest of us.

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on June 28, 2006 9:00 pmUncategorized26 comments  

Lose Weight Now – Ask Me How!

I don’t know about you, but living in L.A., (that’s Los Angeles to you people that live somewhere not as cool as L.A.) it’s extremely important to be thin. This is something I’ve been working on for quite sometime. First there was the ice cream diet where all I ate were ice cream sandwhich bars (healthy choice natch) and Ben and Jerry’s. When I’d get tempted to eat a vegetable, I’d remind myself of how important in this society of Hollywood it is to not succumb to the temptation to pig out on veggies, and remember that Thin is Where It’s At. I mean, especially if you want to be a writer. You don’t want the picture on the back jacket of your book – even if it’s just from the neck up – to show you as a person who doesn’t care deeply about her looks… and what other people may think of her looks.

Seriously, if I’m going to get into the dog eat dog world of Supermodeling for women over 40 (which I will be very soon) then I better put my money where my mouth is, and not put mac & cheese there instead. Yes, I understand there’s always hand modeling, but that’s not where the glamour is. SO, for the past five minutes I’ve been working really hard on my slimmer summer physique. I think we can all agree,I look fantastic. In fact, Nicole Richie can eat her heart out…although, I hear heart, even from Whole Foods, is the fattiest of all the organ meats. So Nicky, baby, I don’t recommend it.

Pretty sweet, huh? Now if I could just do some spot reducing on my face. Does anyone have any good facercises? Or a trainer that specializes in cheeks?

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on June 25, 2006 3:25 amUncategorized21 comments  


First off, I don’t even like the title mommy. My name is Stefanie. I’m not Elby’s mommy, or ‘a mom’ or that 39 year old chick who had a baby recently (but looks great!). I have a lot more to talk about than my child. But, having a child does bring you an instant comradarie with other women who have had a child. I liken it to men who have served in the military. If there were men who blogged about that I guess they’d be “military bloggers” even though they might have many other things to discuss. But they’d make the other military servers feel less alone and have an anonymous place to put a voice to the things that they don’t feel okay to say to other military servers in a public arena or to their wives or superiors.

It’s the same with us moms. I only had a baby 19 months ago. I was a different person 19 months ago. Yet, I was still a person with thoughts and ideas that were relevant even though I had yet to spawn. I had a job that I loved, friends that I loved to drink with, a husband I adored whether or not we had a child and I was very busy buying a house and looking for my next writing gig. Then I got pregnant. It wasn’t a mistake. We’d been thinking about it for awhile but we decided to throw caution to the wind and give it a try. And I got knocked up. So my life changed dramatically and now my opinions and feelings and neurotic tics are chocked up to the title mommy blogger. Well, I’m a lot more than that. Whether or not you’re interested in my thoughts on plastic surgery, people who annoy me, the many jobs I’ve been fired from for having a bad attitude, nudie bars I’ve been turned on in, my love of online and live poker, and yes, my thoughts on something that has been life altering and the most drastic change in my life, becoming a mother, I am more than just that.

Why do people who have a political blog or a photo gallery or foodie or doggy or whatever the fuck people blog about, feel they’re somehow better than ‘mommy bloggers’? I, personally am thrilled to read other blogs by women who understand what I’m going through. Women I don’t have to apologize to for feeling as overwhelmed, scared shitless, thrilled, confused, worried and needy as I sometimes feel. Other “mommy bloggers” get it all and then some. And we’re all different. We all live in different places in the country, have different jobs, interests, lives, husbands (well a few may share the same husband but that’s Utah) and philosophies. But, throught this medium we make each other feel less isolated and like we belong. So, maybe I don’t hate being catagorized as a mommy blogger. If my musings and bitching and blatent honesty help one other mother feel not so alone then call me whatever you want. Because the first year of having a baby was the hardest of any year of my life including 7th grade and that’s saying a lot. Picture, Sears catalog clothes and a very bad home perm, the fact that there are other women out there who understand has saved my life. So, if you want to just disregard me as another “mommy blogger” than I don’t need you to read my log. Thanks anyway.

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on June 23, 2006 4:05 amUncategorized26 comments  

Under The Knife

What the hell is up with Nicole Kidman’s grill? She’s only 39 people! Why, why, why must celebrities screw up their faces in an attempt to look young? Note to Nicole: you already looked young. Now you look like Joan Rivers. You and Meg Ryan are going to have to wear name tags to tell your lips apart. I understand that you feel the heat from Hollywood to stay youthful but the surgery isn’t helping your quest. The worst offender lately is Jessica Lange. She looks like a horror show. I’ll never be able to watch Tootsie without cringing again – and it is one of my favorite movies!

Part of me feels like, wow, is that what people want to see – wax museum versions of beautiful women? But I strongly feel that if women wouldn’t be so quick to doom themselves to the surgeon’s knife and wore their lines proudly, we wouldn’t be subjected to as many Fat Guy/Hot Wife sitcoms. We could have more balanced role models for our young girls who at 12 are already feeling the pressure to measure up. Sorry, but it’s fucking annoying. I’d much rather watch Rosanne than According to Jim anyday.

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on June 21, 2006 3:01 amUncategorized18 comments  

The Politics of Preschool

So, around these parts apparently I’m some sort of leper. I’m the one in my neighborhood that’s not sending my nineteen-month-old child to a temple preschool. Now, for those of you who are not Jewish and obviously going straight to hell or at least not fully understanding the big difference between a frozen bagel and one from a Jewish deli – let alone the difference between a bagel and a biali, temple preschool seems to be the way to go among the lox and cream cheese crowd. I, myself, am Jewish but I’m am opposed to sending my child to a temple preschool where they have the nerve to charge you temple membership fees a YEAR IN ADVANCE to when your child would attend their school. The fee to join up? – only thousands of dollars – plus a lot of extra fees for improvement or some other bullshit. I’m not sure what you get for that except for good seats at the high holidays.

It’s not that I don’t honor my Jewish heritage. I actually got lectured on a previous post for making fun of Jews because of a joke about us being good bargainers even at a nudie bar (sorry but we are). I realize that millions of us were rounded up during world war 2 and that if something that awful happened again I’d be rounded up just like everyone else. But…in the meantime, I don’t want my child leading a sheltered existance in a school where an inordinate amount of time is spend contemplating snacks and the other mothers are waaaaay too into temple politics for my taste. FOR MY TASTE, PEOPLE. Please don’t get all up in arms about this. It’s my personal decision. I think that Judaism has become something less than a spiritual endeavor in these parts of the LA Valley and more of a club of which I don’t need to be a member.

I found a cute preschool close to my house that seems like a throwback to my preschool days which of course I remember clear as a bell. Or not. But no matter. This school only has 12 kids to a class which I think is great. The two teachers have been teaching together for 10 years (maybe they’re gay. All the better). There are children of all creeds and colors and it’s non academic. A developmental preschool in this competitive age is an oasis in the desert.

All I can say is, I went, I saw, I signed up. it’s that easy. I didn’t spend the better part of my daughter’s toddlerhood weighing the pros and cons of which school would give her the best chance in getting into Yale. It’s fucking preschool. I’m putting my money where my book is. I have friends who happily spend the better part of what could be a perfectly enjoyable margarita infused playdate discussing which school district we’re in and how that’s going to affect the old college years of our offspring. Newsflash: I didn’t even go to college and I barely graduated high school with a 2.3 GPA. But in nursery school, I kicked ass. So I don’t think one has anything to do with another and I’m not going to get involved in all the drama that surrounds this hot topic. Let them discuss it on the View, in playgroups and on playdates without me. I’m going with my gut.

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on June 19, 2006 5:05 amUncategorized23 comments  


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