The Joy of Swearing

Sooooo, first off, the Today Show will air my interview next Monday the 10th. I don’t know what time because they decide that the night before. But, hey, at least it’s going to be on! YEAH, IT’S ON BITCH! Hey, if you’ve read my book and liked it could you review it on Amazon? I’ll send you a dollar.

On to more important things. My husband bought the kid a toy…hang on…that’s not the exciting part. It’s this purple centipede thingy where all the feet have different letters on them and if you press down they make the sound of the letter. So, if you push different letters in a row, it will make words like d-o-g DOG! YAY. Here’s the thing – my husband and I are like 12 years old so of course, we immediately try to get the toy to say fuck. You can get the f and the u but when you get to the c the toy says “hey, that tickles.” Seriously. I didn’t believe it at first, I thought we just hit a wrong button but, no, this thing censors. You can’t say shit, ass, fuck and a few others but, surprisingly you can say cunt. Which is weird. But funny. To me. And my husband. This is a toy for babies so I don’t see why a baby who can’t even say juice yet would be trying to get the toy to say asshole. Which leaves me to figure the adults are the ones who “aren’t allowed.” I’m going to protest this! Who’s with me?


Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on April 3, 2006 6:41 pmUncategorized17 comments  


  1. Old Lush said,

    I am going to go get mine out of the toychest now and try…too funny! You’ve given me something to look forward to this afternoon. Thanks.

    | April 4, 2006 @ 9:28 pm

  2. IzzyMom said,

    We have this Leapfrog toy that lets you spell things out and it doesn’t let you spell bad words either. Clearly, these toy people KNOW us…

    | April 4, 2006 @ 9:57 pm

  3. Anonymous said,

    OH! FUNNY! We have the ORIGINAL centipede alphabet guy (ours is green)that does let us spell out and say the bad words. We’ve been known to pull it out at BBQ’s and parties because, honestly, what’s funnier than a cussing, smiling, centipede after a cocktail or two?

    | April 4, 2006 @ 10:54 pm

  4. MrsFortune said,

    Yes, Yes I’m with you! Freedom of centipede speech all the way!! What about other objectionable words? I’m totally with you, why would a kid be trying to spell that?

    I bet you can get it to say George. W. Bush.

    | April 4, 2006 @ 11:22 pm

  5. Mama Kelly said,

    OMGs thats so funny!!!

    i want a cursing centipede!!!!

    btw I saw your book on a Mother’s Day gift idea table when I went to B&N tonight

    my 11yo daughter was very impressed that I “knew you” from your blog

    | April 5, 2006 @ 12:48 am

  6. PortLairge said,

    I have just finished your book and will review it on Amazon( I loved it). Now please tell me the name of the toy that says cunt.I’m only 13 weeks with baby # 1 so I’m not well up on my toys. Try arse- we say that in Ireland instead of ass. A much more effective word, don’t you think? Maybe it will get passed the centipede censor!!!!!!!!

    | April 5, 2006 @ 1:17 am

  7. Mama! Mama! (Mel) said,

    Okay. I am blogrolling you and reading your book. Thanks for stopping by my blog. I’m taking an extra shot of Nyquil just for you tonight. Do you want me to mail you the little cup?

    | April 5, 2006 @ 2:27 am

  8. Krisco said,

    That is too funny. And why would they stop at the c word? (You can see my inner Catholic coming out there…) I mean, if they figure the older brother (I’m giving them the benefit of the doubt that they weren’t worried about PARENTS….who am I kidding, of course they were worried about the parents) why would they stop there? That part’s funny too.

    I can just picture two parents on the floor trying to spell out the dirty words…. : )

    | April 5, 2006 @ 5:11 am

  9. Anonymous said,

    If you put it on the switch that sounds out the letters, with a little bit of dexterity you can get the it to say cunt although it sounds more like ca un nn tt. Still amusing. Shit works too.

    | April 5, 2006 @ 2:27 pm

  10. Lena said,

    Oookay, I guess centipedes don’t have freedom of speech?

    Freaking Bush and his cronies!! 😉

    | April 5, 2006 @ 5:13 pm

  11. KTP said,

    I LOVE this post. We have this toy, and my mother is actually the one who discovered this phenomenon for us. And she is a very mild-mannered, non-swearing person.

    | April 5, 2006 @ 11:44 pm

  12. Hello Kitty said,

    I’ve had this toy kicking around for a couple of years and it never occured to me to try this!
    Looking forward to exploring the possibilities, although with a 5 year old around learning to spell I’ll have to do it after 7pm.

    ps. I LOVE that you talk about drinking . I think I mention it daily on mine and while I probably only have 1 drink a few nites a week, I like to think about the possibility of drinking ALLOT!

    | April 6, 2006 @ 1:58 am

  13. lynsalyns said,

    We did that, too. But you can spell SHIT on some of them. Gotta love the Alphabet Pal. We also spelled the C-word and laughed like idiots. Guess the good folks at Leap Frog didn’t think baby could be that filty-minded.

    My 15-month old said shit last week.

    Yeah. That’s not good.

    | April 6, 2006 @ 2:10 am

  14. scarbie doll said,

    Maybe they feel that cunt is OK because everybody came out of one? (‘cept C-sections, but who’s counting?)

    My 15 month old says “Ah Shhhhh” when he falls or doesn’t get his way. There is truly no better way to express yourself when you’re angry. If they can’t let parents have a little fun, fuck ’em.

    | April 6, 2006 @ 2:54 am

  15. sweatpantsmom said,

    Awwww – too bad you didn’t have it when you did the ‘Today’ show. I guess there’s always next time.

    Off to buy a purple centipede…

    | April 6, 2006 @ 3:53 am

  16. Misfit Hausfrau said,

    Suuhweet! I am going to go and buy one of those–that’s good stuff!

    Congrats on the Today interview. I have it marked on my calendar to watch the Today Show!

    I also will buy the book!

    | April 6, 2006 @ 12:34 pm

  17. willowfae said,

    I have this toy and I had no idea it would sound out words. I am totally going to try it as soon as my little one is in bed!

    | April 8, 2006 @ 4:29 am

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