Listen fans,

Elby just turned 9 months. I’m trying to get her ready to get on the pageant circuit and make a big splash. I know she has the talent to go all the way but does she have the drive? That’s the real question that remains to be answered. First of all, she’s still a few pounds overweight and she carries it all in her chubby little thighs. I’m serious. those things could make her some good money at…El Pollo Loco – but not in pageants. I have her doing the Adkins diets but the bottom line is, she’s gotta want it. I guess the hardest part for her is the “no alcohol” but, what the fuck, I had to go without booze for like 3 months when I was pregnant with her so come on!

I wouldn’t be supporting her in this if she wasn’t so talented though. She’s been begging me to do it since she was three months old. But at that time I was like, hey, it’s too early. See if you still feel the same way when you’re six months old. Then at six months I almost forgot about it because she was more into baby modeling but then she asked again about pageants and I was like, okay, let’s do this. Together. It’s amazing how close you can get with your daughter when you’re working toward a common goal like making sure you’re daughter is the prettiest.

I’m starting to really wish I’d named her Mykala or Brittney or some other name that was synonymous with PAGEANTS. But oh well, we can always legally change it later but for now we’ll just call her Kendyll.

Anyway, her first competition (it won’t be much of a competition if I know my sweetie) will be Miss Texas Citrus Fruits 2005! Good luck, sweet pea.

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on August 14, 2005 4:59 amUncategorized5 comments  


  1. sarcastic journalist said,

    We’re going for the Texas Citrus Fruits too!! Too bad my kid is going to win. I have a crowbar that says so.

    | August 21, 2005 @ 2:53 am

  2. chris said,

    My good friend’s sister is a crazy, rich, southern belle wanna-be pageant mom (her daughter turned out a little homely, it seems, so no pageants, but momma’s got the drive I tell you). Anyway, before they moved to Memphis from AL, she started saying “Madison, don’t you think Synclaire is a beautiful name” over and over and finally, the kid, who was then six, says she loves the name and they LEGALLY change it before the big move because the mother thought there were too many Madisons running around. Which there are. But hey, that’s just freaky.

    PS: SHe also changed her oldest son’s name before the move too. Because it wasn’t unique enough. Soooo narcisistic.

    I’m not kidding.

    | August 31, 2005 @ 12:00 am

  3. Anonymous said,

    hi, this is the first time on this blog – and i was wondering if anyone knew anything about baby-modeling or ny child modeling agency. I found a site about **baby modeling** and i was wondering if anyone had bought whateve it is that they want to sell

    | October 7, 2005 @ 1:23 am

  4. chris said,

    Hey. Thanks for the comments on my blog and the positive thoughts. I need all the help I can get. Now update, will ya?

    | October 26, 2005 @ 1:00 pm

  5. Jess Riley said,

    Have you ever seen the Fetus Pageant episode on Mr. Show with Bob and David? 🙂 Very funny stuff. Love your posts!

    | January 2, 2006 @ 10:29 pm

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