Archive for July, 2005


My daughter turned 8 months old today! Happy birthday precious! Naturally we threw her a huge party like we do every month. But because money was a little tight this past few weeks, we only spent $4000 and not the usual 8 grand. I have a feeling she didn’t even notice. I mean, the little tulip is only 8 months old! She doesn’t know the difference between Osetra and Beluga caviar…yet.

I guess the only drawback was the entertainment. She really really wanted the Dave Matthew’s Band, or DMB as she babbles, to play but that would’ve been over our budget. So we made the mistake of hiring a DMB cover band for $800 dollars and figured she wouldn’t know the difference. Wrong. She cried through all three of their sets. Especially when they played Ants Go Marching. Hell, you would’ve thought my little turtle dumpling was teething or something.

On the brightside, the moonbouncer was a big hit again with only 17 injuries to infants as opposed to 40 from last month. I guess the little buggers get a little sturdier every day! Only 6 of the babies required hospitalization so YAY!!

Anyway, I think the 230 babies and kids that came to the party had a really good time (except the injured ones). They all left with giftbags containing Coco Chanel parfume and powder, Mac Lip Glosser in assorted colors (7 of them), Gucci baby clutches and DMB coverband CD’s.

So thanks to all the mommies who came down and celebrated with us. See you next month!!



Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on July 12, 2005 11:02 pmUncategorized7 comments  


I wonder when the appropriate time to stop swearing around your child is. Here’s the thing; my husband and I used the filthiest language possible to express affection.

Such as:

Jon: What’s up, dumb cunt?
Me: Not much asswipe. Hey, did you stop at Cost Co today?
Jon: Yeah.
Me: Thanks for remembering to go fuckhead. I guess you didn’t brick this time.
Jon: What the fuck did you think was going to happen? What’s on TiVo?

and so on. I think it goes without saying that we love each other a ridiculous amount. Obviously, anyone reading that can see how close we are. But…I sure would hate to get called to pre-school because my daughter called a boy she liked a dumbfuck. Maybe, Jon and I should come up with some words that are CODE for fuckhead like Honeymuffin or Sweetie. Would that be crazy? We could call each other all kinds of nicknames and no one would be the wiser. Of course, people will think we’re insane but WE WON’T CARE! We’re not like other people. We do our own thing! Fuck em.

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on July 9, 2005 11:27 pmUncategorized4 comments  

OPB – Other People’s Babies

I was really worried before I got pregnant and while I was pregnant that I’m just not a baby person. I was really concerned that that feeling wouldn’t change even when I had my own baby. In fact, I spent an inordinate amount of time worrying about it. I’d check out women with babies in stores- and I’d love to say parks but before I had a child there was really no need for me to step foot into a park which was another worry not being a “park person” – hoping to feel something about their babies. I’d hope to think “wow, what an adorable little person you’ve got there” or even just “so cute” but I hardly thought anything more than “oh a baby.” That’s not a good feeling when you’re going to have one.

So, now I have a baby and I’d love to say that the world of babies has opened up. That I think babies are so adorable now. Unfortunately I don’t. Of course my baby is unbelievably cute. I can’t get enough of looking at her and taking her picture but I just can’t get it up for other people’s kids. Luckily, I don’t believe this affects my mothering in any way. I really thought you had to just LOVE kids to parent one but I guess that’s not so. Thank god or we’d have some serious problems around here what with the mommy police being so strict.

I do wish I had slightly more interest in joining Mom groups or doing interesting stuff with my shortie but I really have to force myself. Thank god she loves her exersaucer so much. And trips to Western Bagel. My baby loves a bagel. She’s a carb addict like her mom. Isn’t that cute?

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on July 8, 2005 8:45 pmUncategorized4 comments  


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