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#ParentingFail the POST


I put everyone’s confessions together and put it in a post at Babble. I think it came out really great but you be the judge.

I would love to hear more of your “confessions” because they truly help me feel connected to all of you and less cray-cray; especially coming off the end of what was basically three weeks of spring break with my children. My children are like candy: I crave them, can’t get enough of them, think about them all the time and then just when I least expect it, never thought it could happen, feel incredibly sick and need to not see or hear candy for a little while. You get what I mean.

So check out the post and if you haven’t yet, leave a confession of your own in the comments!

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on April 16, 2012 12:53 am2 comments  

#ParentingFail

I believe that I’m an excellent mom. I strive for excellence, put my damn back into excellence. And when I fall short of excellence, I look hard at my weaknesses and attempt to improve. That being said, one mom’s brand of excellence is another mom’s sub par slacker-ass, downright non-excellence. So it’s all relative.

Just today Matilda made me a little play-doh figure and when she handed it to me apparently I held it wrong and squashed it a teeny tiny hard to see way. She cried…a lot. When I couldn’t understand why she was crying it escalated sobbing which escalated quickly into a tantrum. I told her to go to her room where she cried that I ruined her thing over and over.

I admit I felt extremely agitated. I really wanted to yell at her to stop it because, come on! What the hell had I done wrong? Why was she screaming so hard? Is she possessed? Would it ever stop? But I was able to say to myself, “She’s only four. She’s probably tired. And hungry.” It was 5:45 and I hadn’t made her dinner yet. Also, yelling at her to stop yelling probably wouldn’t have had a beneficial outcome to either party. So I went to her room, sat on the edge of the bed and just said, “I don’t understand why you are crying this hard over me accidentally squishing part of your play-doh.” And she said, “Because you didn’t apologize.”

So I did. And she said, “It’s okay.” And she hugged me and it was done.

It’s moments like that where I do think that I’m growing, that maybe I rule just a tiny bit. But then I get on the computer and tune them out while I check my email and I think, “hmm…maybe not so much on the ruling.”

So even though I think I do an overall good job, and that I believe we all do an overall good job -after all, if you’re reading my blog you must be somewhat interested in parenting -there are some things I do which would make many people roll their eyes. I will list a few for you now:

I’ve given Sadie ice cream for breakfast.
Sometimes I give in to whining.
A lot of emails asking for classroom volunteers go unanswered.
I once let Matilda eat a peanut m&m that rolled out of a candy machine and onto the floor at the mall.
Elby gets to watch Dance Moms.
Sometimes Elby gets to play games on my computer in lieu of a bedtime story.
My kids don’t bathe every day. In fact, Matilda recently went so long without a bath I’m ashamed to say she smelled homeless.
The whole lot of them eat Happy Meals once in awhile. And by once in awhile I mean probably once a week.
I oftentimes don’t make my kids clean up their toys because it’s easier to do it myself than to stay on them about it.
I buy too many toys.

Okay, there you go. Now. I want to do a blog post where I showcase some of your admissions. Can you please send me a picture of you with your kid(s) and a line or two of something you do that you know other moms wouldn’t approve of?

When I get 20 I’ll post them and give you the link. Thanks so much to all who are willing to participate!!

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on April 10, 2012 7:09 pm12 comments  

Babysitters -The Unsung Heroes

It’s rare to find someone to help you with your kids who cares for them anywhere in the ballpark of how you care for them. I had that in Liz. When I had my twins I was on an ill-timed deadline to finish my third book. Between hormones (double the dose), PPD, preemies just home from the hospital and work stress I was the epitome of a hot mess.  But luckily I had a secret weapon: my newly hired help. I’d hired a nanny to help me bridge the gap because I knew I had to get my book in but I also had another child who had just started preschool in addition to the twins. It was going to be a nearly impossible situation.  She sort of took over while I cried over my computer, over my deadline, over my perceived lack of parenting twins ability. Liz stepped in and stepped up, taking the twins for long walks, helping me hold them, feed them, love them. Liz saved my life.

And I almost didn’t hire her.

When I was maybe seven months pregnant I had a pretty lackadaisical approach. I sort of figured I had a lot of time to choose someone. When Liz came over she was very sweet but clearly meant business -letting me know that she had a strong religious faith -Jehovah’s Witness and wanted to make sure I didn’t have a problem with that. All I knew about Jehovah’s Witnesses was that Michael Jackson was one and that they liked to knock on people’s doors a lot. So after Liz left I Googled it and what I found really didn’t bother me. Hey, she wasn’t a Scientologist! But I didn’t call her back right away because I just wasn’t ready to commit.

Cut to a few weeks later when I found myself on bedrest in the hospital. While I was there, not thinking about nannies, my husband told me that Liz had called and that she was very interested in the job. Apparently she was being offered another job but she wanted to work with me more (I wish it was because I was so pretty and charming but I think it was more because the other job seemed like more work and required travel). So seeing as it would’ve been tough to start interviewing more people at this stage and based on a good feeling, we hired her. Don’t you just love trusting your instincts? It was the best decision ever made out of sheer laziness and desperation.

Liz became a part of our family. She saw me bloated, teary, overwhelmed, panicked and vulnerable and she never let on that it was anything less than a normal situation.

When Sadie got a feeding tube button put in, Liz was one of the first people to feed her through it. I’ll never ever forget that.

So when I hear stories of people who don’t take good care of the people who take good care of their kids it makes me crazy.

I wrote a post about it on Babble called, Are You a Babysitters Worst Nightmare? Give it a read because I’d love to hear your comments or stories!

 

 

 

 

 

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on March 26, 2012 1:16 pm4 comments  

Sadie’s Feet

So Sadie broke through the 28 lb mark. This may not seem like much to you owners of fat babies, babies who weighed 28 pounds by the time they were 18 months, but to us it’s a huge deal. I almost cried when I saw the number. Almost. I’m not a pussy.

It was honestly starting to seem like Sadie would weigh 27 pounds forever. This is the problem with with these small kids: They can eat all day long and not gain a pound. Sure it’s a wonderful trait for a supermodel or anxiety ridden forty-five-year-old who binges on Girl Scout Cookies to relieve stress, but a preschooler needs to gain weight. They need the pounds for little things like, I don’t know, brain development and eventually reaching the height of a kitchen counter.

Most of the time I try not to think about Sadie’s height. Unfortunately Mattie is full head taller and outweighs Sadie by 14 pounds so it is sort of a constant reminder. But we are doing what we know is right for now: she eats healthy foods and as much as she wants as often as she wants and she is followed by an excellent endocrinologist at Children’s Hospital Los Angeles. Short of the growth hormones, there’s nothing else to do but let nature take its course. Yeah, you know how well I do with “going with the flow.” I like to be in control, take action, keep things moving. I also like to read the last page of a novel or be told the ending to a movie before I see it. My two favorite words are *spoiler alert*

And this is why I have a scale.

I may not be able to do anything about Sadie’s weight but I can at least keep track of it.

So excuse me while I have a little celebration for the number 28!

P.S. I wrote a story about Matilda’s eating habits which you can check out on my Babble Blog if you like.

If you’re in Vegas right now put ten buck on it at the roulette table or at least have a Shamrock shake in Sadie’s honor.

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on March 23, 2012 2:59 pm7 comments  

Boobs – Hee Hee

You know that as a mom of three who works about 18 jobs I have tons of time on my hands. I mean, that’s a given right? So of course I checked out Pinterest and also the website ecards because I have funny thoughts and need a place to put them to pictures. Here’s my latest.

I did another funny one on Babble that I recommend you check out.

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on March 12, 2012 3:42 pmComments are off  


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