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Win a Copy of I’m Kind of a Big Deal or Die Trying

Happy Thursday/Friday. I actually set this to post at 5 a.m today but it didn’t so this is for both days. Enjoy this excerpt from the chapter, Driving Miss Bateman. I will happily send a signed copy of the new book, I’m Kind of a Big Deal to a person I pick randomly from today’s comments. Oh, God, wouldn’t it feel good to win?

Justine Bateman can fuck herself with her skis. And the same goes for her sister, I thought to myself as I sat in the driver’s seat of my limo –scratch that, town car – outside of Killer Shrimp waiting for the ‘80’s sitcom star to finish eating her hour long dinner. She and her sister were taking full advantage of the two hour ride maximum while I stayed behind in the car starving to death and nursing sore muscles from carrying their ski trip gear the length of Burbank airport, out through the parking garage and loading it into the trunk. It wasn’t looking good for me to make a quick drop-off, call dispatch and grab another client and it seemed more than likely this would be another twenty-six dollar day.

I desperately needed a full body massage after the crap week I’d had, but obviously I couldn’t afford it. So far, I’d received a single paycheck which was somewhere in the neighborhood of $185 –and that was for two weeks’ work –after taxes. So I was pulling in about ninety bucks a week, which would have been awesome in 1920 but it wasn’t going to afford me even a decent foot rub in 1994.
To be fair to Justine, it wasn’t really her fault. Carrying luggage was part of the driver’s job and clients were full within their rights to make use of their two hour trip paid for by the studio any way they wanted. But sitting around waiting for someone to finish eating an expensive dinner while other drivers were getting assigned the good trips, wasn’t what I’d signed up for. Driving celebrities around was supposed to be the cool part of the job; the perk, a possible networking opportunity, or so I’d thought when I applied for the job. And to make matters worse, it was becoming clear I’d have to decide between the job and my dog.

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on June 16, 2011 5:00 amUncategorized42 comments  

42 Comments

  1. Chel said,

    I’m leaving a comment because I’ve enjoyed the excerpts that you’ve posted and I would love to win the book.
    Chel

    | June 17, 2011 @ 12:41 am

  2. Charmedone17 said,

    Loved reading all the posts so far…hope I win!!!

    | June 17, 2011 @ 2:06 am

  3. rebecca said,

    Has anyone told you that you are an amazing writer? Well….You. Are!
    rebecca´s last blog post ..More On Potty Training

    | June 17, 2011 @ 2:26 am

    • Stefanie said,

      Hey, quit buttering me up! What are planning lawsuit?

      | June 17, 2011 @ 8:58 pm

      • rebecca said,

        Why would I try to sue you? You’re amazing and I totally want you to write more. I don’t think they’d let you write in prison.
        rebecca´s last blog post ..They Were Difficult

        | June 23, 2011 @ 2:51 pm

  4. Kelsey said,

    I love free things – and I love your books – this post is right up my alley!
    Kelsey´s last blog post ..Difficult- This Parenting Is

    | June 17, 2011 @ 2:34 am

  5. Black Hockey Jesus said,

    I like today’s odds.
    Black Hockey Jesus´s last blog post ..Stealing Candy

    | June 17, 2011 @ 3:30 am

  6. Stella said,

    I bet that if Justine doesn’t try to do it with her skis, then some freak out in the world will or already has done so. I’m tellin’ ya, there are freaks on this great earth that we live! Great excerpt, I’ve enjoyed them, now can I have a signed copy to show my Mom friends. They’ll be jealous 😉
    Stella´s last blog post ..We Want To Know Wednesdays!

    | June 17, 2011 @ 3:39 am

  7. Melissa I said,

    I love these excerpts. I hope I win a copy!

    | June 17, 2011 @ 5:02 am

  8. kirida said,

    I love this post. A signed copy would be so awesome and then at BlogHer I could be all fangirl and say, that was me!
    kirida´s last blog post ..making a hot mess out of hotlanta

    | June 17, 2011 @ 5:22 am

  9. Amelia said,

    So funny!

    | June 17, 2011 @ 5:39 am

  10. kristen b said,

    Love this weeks posts, its been nice to see something new posted regularly – I love your writing. Hope I win!!

    | June 17, 2011 @ 1:57 pm

  11. Amy said,

    Can’t wait to read the book!

    | June 17, 2011 @ 2:18 pm

  12. Christina said,

    I am lovin’ this book so far, I hope I win!

    | June 17, 2011 @ 2:18 pm

  13. kara said,

    I would love, love, love a free copy of this book. Sippy cups was my how to manual when it came to raising my daughter. I can’t wait to read your newest!

    | June 17, 2011 @ 2:53 pm

  14. Krista said,

    I want to win!! Just think about all the free advertising when I carry your book to the bus stop and all my friends admire the signed copy. Considering I am also kind of a big deal, they will all run out and buy a copy to qualify them for the “in crowd”. So you should pick me!!! Also, I really enjoy your work!!

    | June 17, 2011 @ 2:58 pm

  15. Jamie said,

    Can’t wait to read your new book. From what you have posted of it so far, it sounds funny.

    | June 17, 2011 @ 3:10 pm

  16. The Last Girl Standing said,

    I bet Tina Yothers would’ve never done that. Just sayin’….
    The Last Girl Standing´s last blog post ..Big Meanie

    | June 17, 2011 @ 6:30 pm

  17. Kelli said,

    Wouldn’t that be weird if the next time you get a limo (ok Town Car)…Justine Bateman was driving you? Times are tough for 80s sit com actors!

    | June 17, 2011 @ 6:35 pm

  18. Marta said,

    I wanna win!!!

    I also would second how funny it’d be if Justine Bateman was your driver =)
    Marta´s last blog post ..Having a Sick Kid can Ruin Your Career

    | June 17, 2011 @ 6:41 pm

  19. Leah B said,

    I just started reading Sippy Cups Are Not For Chardonnay and I am literally laughing out loud. Plus, being a new mom it has totally made me feel better. And…I would love to win the new book.

    | June 17, 2011 @ 7:05 pm

  20. Ellen S. said,

    Love it! Can’t wait to read the whole thing!

    | June 17, 2011 @ 7:39 pm

  21. sara said,

    So far so wonderful! I want to win!
    sara´s last blog post ..Hard Ways To Get Some Me Time

    | June 17, 2011 @ 10:47 pm

  22. Lisa said,

    I find it hilarious that even in 1994 Justine Bateman still had enough pull to get herself a limo! Is she still around? Are you still driving her??

    | June 18, 2011 @ 1:08 am

  23. Erin@MommyontheSpot said,

    I have been entering contests left and right to win a copy of your book.

    But to be honest, if I don’t win, you know my ass is going to be buying that book. I mean, who else records a whole episode of The Today Show (even that hour of Hoda and Kathy) because it was *rumored* that you were going to be on. That would be me.

    | June 18, 2011 @ 1:52 am

  24. Bettejo Pino said,

    Having the day from hell, and I’m walking out with more than a sunburn. Oh how happy you would make me if you picked me….Raising hand and doing my best sweathog impersonation….ohhhh ooohhhh pick me

    | June 18, 2011 @ 3:57 pm

  25. Rainyday said,

    Just another reason why I hate driving. Which makes it rather dumb that I just bought a car. And my husband doesn’t drive. So I’m driving everyone everywhere everyday.
    Rainyday´s last blog post ..Happy Fathers Day

    | June 19, 2011 @ 11:50 pm

  26. Emily said,

    I just found you on Broadminded this morning, and I think you are really funny. I look forward to exploring your blog more and finding out about the books you have written.

    | June 20, 2011 @ 11:42 pm

  27. Sara @ Periwinkle Papillon said,

    I’m a regular listener on the Parent Experiment – would love to hear you talk more about your ‘adventures’ on the podcast. You always seem to stop yourself from telling a story! You’ve been a great addition. 😀
    Sara @ Periwinkle Papillon´s last blog post ..Make Love Not War

    | June 21, 2011 @ 4:18 am

  28. Erin said,

    Now that’s the way to start a chapter. A celebrity reference, an F word, and a sexual visual. I like how you roll.

    Now, Justin Bateman? I’d have waited all night for him.

    | June 22, 2011 @ 4:32 am

  29. Dell said,

    I just finished watching Mother’s Little Helper on OWN and reading some of the blogs! Hey are you sure you aren’t talking about me? lol.. I would love to win any and all of them!
    Happy Anniversary Miss Stefanie!

    | June 22, 2011 @ 6:57 pm

  30. Anna said,

    Loved the parts so far, would love to win the book!

    | June 23, 2011 @ 1:48 pm

  31. Sherry said,

    I’m loving the excerpts from this book!!! You’re wicked funny!

    | June 23, 2011 @ 4:12 pm

  32. T.J. Hartley said,

    I heard you on a radio interview the other day and decided to check out your blog. Really enjoying it.

    | June 23, 2011 @ 5:01 pm

  33. Jae said,

    I love these snippets you’re sharing! Thank you!!
    Jae´s last blog post ..Trapped

    | June 23, 2011 @ 5:37 pm

  34. Kate N said,

    I was just sitting here feeling sorry for myself about my recent reunion with my estranged father while tooting around at the office not doing any work and decided to read about Katies Holmes pregnanacy on Today (she interests me because I think she is pretty and quiet which is intriguing. Usually pretty girls are loud mouths. j/k – love all you pretty girls out there) — your letter — which I loved also made me laugh (thank you, needed that) so I googled you and got here. I would LOVE to read your book and was pretty floored to see some similarities in my week and your story about your dad because I had no idea about you or anything like that before I clicked onto this link. I wanted another laugh but got something more! Thank you for sharing. Sometimes you touch someone and don’t even mean to. I needed that! Have a great weekend!

    | June 24, 2011 @ 7:08 pm

  35. Sara said,

    So funny! Would love to read your book!

    | June 24, 2011 @ 11:03 pm

  36. rebecca said,

    Just watched the link of the Today Show. Just wanted to let you know that you looked amazingly fabulous and totally skinny. You don’t look anywhere near 40! You’re beautiful!
    rebecca´s last blog post ..The Petunia

    | June 26, 2011 @ 9:36 pm

  37. Angie LIskey said,

    Can’t wait to read the whole thing!

    | June 28, 2011 @ 2:24 pm

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