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This Too Shall Pass

The last three nights Sadie and Matilda slept through the night. Cue the angel choir. It is that good, this feeling of getting uninterrupted rest. Mentally I feel so jaunty I should be wearing a little chauffer’s cap and riding pants or maybe sitting by a lake skipping rocks while whistling an old timey tune. I’m a new person I tell ya! It’s amazing what sleep will do for your overall outlook –well, sleep and drugs but one of those outlook changers is off the menu for me and one of them has been tough to get lately.

Not only have the twins been sleeping through the night but with the exception of yesterday, they have been napping again. Sweet Jesus am I lucky or what? P.S. – to all of you who suggested Melatonin, thank you, thank you, thank you. It’s working. I hadn’t actually asked my doctor but as I wrote this I started feeling guilty about it so I just emailed my pediatrician to ask. But this is the same doc who suggested Benadryl to cope with a bout of night terrors so I can’t see him suddenly being anti “something you can buy from Whole Foods that is all natural and will possibly prevent me from running in front of a speeding train.” He’s cool like that.

Last night I actually broiled some salmon (yes, I managed to set off the smoke detector), sautéed some squash and blackened some garlic bread in the oven and then Jon and I watched TV. It’s true. We sat our asses down on a couch and watched television uninterrupted for almost two hours. First we watched Mad Men and then we fast forwarded through Ochocinco: The Ultimate Catch. I think the ultimate catch in his case may be the Herp virus based on the “ladies” he’s picking for his dates -I’m looking at you Tara. But I think the main point is my brain got a chance to relax and realize that there is more going on in the world than my children, their relentless whining and Lindsay Lohan.

I don’t know how long our reprieve will last but despite my proclamations that Sadie is damaged goods, I think she may be going through a rough patch and not showing signs of becoming a raging sociopath like I was starting to suspect. I have a bad habit of thinking that whatever is going on in my life is the new normal -that life is going to be this way forever and ever amen. If I have a migraine it’s impossible to remember a time that I didn’t feel like a machete was wedged between my ears, if I’m unemployed I can’t believe I ever bought a new CD without fear of sinking financially, when American Idol is between seasons I am positive I’ll never enjoy TV again.

I know intellectually that life does keep moving forward and my children will continue getting older and moving through stages and I should enjoy where they are now because they grow so fast …I do know that. But if one more person says it, I will kick them in the uterus, because this shit, right now, is hard.

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on August 23, 2010 10:38 pmUncategorized27 comments  

27 Comments

  1. inannasstar said,

    Motherhumper I HATE when people say “enjoy them while they’re young, they grow up so fast”. I swear to Gawd it makes me want to say to them “enjoy yourself this second, because you’re about to meet your maker biatch”.
    inannasstar´s last blog post ..Take Two and Dont Bitch Slap Me in the Morning

    | August 23, 2010 @ 10:52 pm

  2. rebecca said,

    I totally didn’t enjoy the infant stage because that stuff is hard. My kids cried so much they made colic look like happy, easy going babies. But the stuff like the first day of preschool and first day of kindergarten…now that’s the stuff to enjoy because it doesn’t last. Thank God, right?!
    rebecca´s last blog post ..Sunday Snapshot – Sundays in My City

    | August 23, 2010 @ 11:34 pm

  3. Melissa said,

    I’m glad Sadie isn’t going ot be a sociopath. that is very reassuring! I hope the good times continue!

    | August 24, 2010 @ 1:03 am

  4. Fiona said,

    Oh Stephanie I am so happy for you! Yes it will come back here and there and be trumped by other stuff but yea you are rested. I think most parents think a “phase” of bad behavior will last through adulthood and we get freaked. You are so not alone. Thank you so much for updating…as we all go through our mundane worries about our kids I think we were all too wondering “is she sleeping yet”?

    | August 24, 2010 @ 1:05 am

  5. Maryann said,

    Stephanie, I just love you so much. Sometimes when I read your blog I get the creepy feeling that you had access to my brain and I feel so much better then because I realize I am not ‘the only person who feels exactly how I feel’, so that means I must be somewhat okay, or at least somewhere in the vicinity of normal. I just can’t tell you how much I relate to you, so I’ll just say Thank You!

    | August 24, 2010 @ 1:11 am

    • Donna said,

      Maryann, you said it so well exactly what I feel. Stephanie, I swear I am your twin. I am 42 and also have 2-1/2 (almost 3) yr old twins. This is hell! And I’m trying to potty train this week. Kill me now, but seriously, thank you for helping me get through the day sometimes.

      | September 2, 2010 @ 6:57 pm

  6. Misty said,

    So glad the melatonin is working! I’m telling you my life is sooo much better since I’ve been using it. This age is HARD, and it’s so much worse when you can’t get any sleep. I had my 2, that were 11.5 months apart, and a husband that had sleep apnea waking up an average of 120 times a night. I didn’t get out of pajamas for 3 years. It does pass, they do grow up, and while it’s nice to remember the good times you have now, if you don’t, there will be good times in the future. Mine are 10 and 11 now and I have the time to marvel at them, but I probably still won’t remember any of it, lol, the curse of a mushy brain.

    | August 24, 2010 @ 1:25 am

  7. Kir said,

    I agree, I am having a hard time “enjoying” myself when I feel like I am living with little bi polar people…all the GD time.
    I like when they say Cute things and I try to remember them as they whine their way through my sinus cavaties into my head.
    but it should pass….right??? I mean they won’t be 2 forever….THANK GAWD.
    :)
    Kir´s last blog post ..Perfect Moment Monday- The SHHS Reunion- how it went

    | August 24, 2010 @ 12:57 pm

  8. Nicole said,

    How much melatonin are you using and how soon before their bedtime do you give it to them?

    | August 24, 2010 @ 1:25 pm

  9. Wendi said,

    You’re so right. And this is EXACTLY what my parents said to comfort each other when I was in my Wham! stage.

    | August 24, 2010 @ 1:41 pm

  10. Jennifer June said,

    “enjoy them while they’re young, they grow up so fast”

    Yeah… In a way it’s true like how I wish I was flipping through a Discovery Toys catalogue with my two year old instead of birth control methods with my 15 year old or weighing the pros and cons of cloth verses disposable diapers instead of kicking my kid out or locking her in the basement until she turns 35 or even being looked at with big adoring eyes while I coo softly against the softest skin instead of being sneered and hissed at under rolling eyes and heaving sighs
    but…
    I can’t really imagine a world where I truly enjoy colic, being puked on daily or not being able to remember the last day that I bathed or brushed my teeth.
    I’m just saying…
    Jennifer June´s last blog post ..You’re sick!

    | August 24, 2010 @ 2:40 pm

  11. Mookie said,

    Really, the best advice I can give you is enjoy them while you can, because they grow up so fast. Hahahahaha I don’t have a uterus so you can’t hurt me. Wait, do I?

    | August 24, 2010 @ 3:20 pm

  12. Sarah said,

    I love that saying – this too shall pass. After Friday night, I decided I needed it tattooed on my arm so that I will always remember it.

    Seriously, I am glad they are sleeping again. Sleep does wonders for the mind, and it allows you to feel better about everything. I hope they give you lots more peaceful nights with your husband.
    Sarah´s last blog post ..Professional Pictures

    | August 24, 2010 @ 3:42 pm

  13. mischa said,

    This does NOT sound like fun.

    | August 24, 2010 @ 4:31 pm

  14. Kristin said,

    Just thought I’d give you a heads up about what our pediatrician said about melatonin. Great for occasional use, don’t use it regularly as it has linked to a diabetes risk. We use it every so often (maybe 1x a week) for our youngest who is 5 and never never never has gone to sleep without a struggle. Without that warning from our pediatrician I’d use it for for more often. Also, my husband and I have found when we take it that it gives really lucid, strange dreams, so consider that for the little ones too.

    | August 24, 2010 @ 5:59 pm

  15. Dorothea said,

    I know this is just a line but it is a line that has kept me going through the roughest times of motherhood. My friend who has three kids and a circus of issues relating to said children once told me this. Do not get to upset or too used to any stage. When my tears are forming and my head is throbbing I say that to myself and believe it or not, it helps. So does crying into a pillow, running out the door and catching a city bus to no where. Choose your poison, old friend.
    Dorothea´s last blog post ..Wax On- Wax Off

    | August 24, 2010 @ 6:39 pm

  16. Mommy on the Spot said,

    I felt this way when 10pm would roll around and all of a sudden my baby wasn’t crying for 2 hours. When this phase stopped and I wasn’t preparing to huddle in a corner and rock myself during this horrible time, I realized there was a bit more to life than crying babies.

    Fast forward another year and I felt that same revelation during my first weekend away from the kids in over a year.

    I guess it’s a little more freedom, a little at a time. Hang in there!!

    | August 24, 2010 @ 9:23 pm

  17. Lulu said,

    You read my mind sometimes! When things are hard, I forget it is a STAGE. It seems like it will never end. And then when it does it’s like a miracle has occurred. My grandmother recently said her mother used to tell her when things were hard and she was wishing for the next stage: “Don’t wish your life away.” I feel safe in telling you this because my great-grandmother passed away in 1970 so you can’t possibly punch her in the uterus.

    Love ya!
    Lulu´s last blog post ..NoPrescriptionNeededcom

    | August 24, 2010 @ 9:32 pm

  18. Robin said,

    Yeah. Hard. And fully felt, every toss, every turn, every night terror (we have a lot of those down here, and not just Mimi). Hang in. Watch more Ochocinco. Shitty TV is manna for the exhausted brain.
    Robin´s last blog post ..I did the strangest thing on vacation part 2

    | August 24, 2010 @ 10:39 pm

  19. Samantha said,

    Ahh, ending your post with a little violence against women joke.

    Hilarious.

    Except not.

    | August 25, 2010 @ 2:35 am

  20. denise thomas said,

    Amen, sista.

    | August 25, 2010 @ 9:50 am

  21. Ellie said,

    I’m glad the clouds parted for a bit. The problem I have with ‘This too shall pass’ is that when things start to go well, that saying morphs into ‘This is too good to be true, when is the other shoe gonna fall?’.

    My daughter turned into a demon before each and every cognitive milestone – and, like you, I couldn’t remember what it felt like to be sane. Of course, I was drinking my face off, which decidedly didn’t help.

    Before she walked, before she talked, before she learned to accessorize … each of them was preceeded by a visit from the Bitch Fairy. So I feel your pain.

    I hope someone does say to you “enjoy them while they’re young” because I’d love to see you kick someone in the uterus. That sounds like a good time to me.’

    -Ellie
    Ellie´s last blog post ..How It Works

    | August 25, 2010 @ 3:05 pm

  22. C&Cs MOM said,

    I can’t stand when people say that either! They can only say it because they aren’t in it anymore! It still sucks going through these “stages” with your children even if it’s short lived.
    Enjoy your sleep…

    | August 25, 2010 @ 3:40 pm

  23. Issa said,

    I only have one toddler. (I also have 6 & 8 year old’s) He’s not quite two yet. Each time someone tells me, they don’t stay toddlers forever, I want to hand him to them and run…screaming over my shoulder: great, bring him home when he’s over it. kthxbai
    Issa´s last blog post ..I like cupcakes

    | August 25, 2010 @ 10:08 pm

  24. NT said,

    I am the same way: whatever is happening right now I am certain is the way things will ALWAYS be. Like now, with a sick kid, I am convinced that I will never get any work done again, never have a restful night of sleep again. Crazy.

    And yes, the people who say enjoy it now because it goes so fast? Can suck it. Because really, do they think that’s helpful? They are the same people who think that if they say “calm down,” you will actually feel calm.

    | August 26, 2010 @ 4:20 pm

  25. Julie said,

    Swear to God, the only thing, ONLY thing I’ve really learned in almost six years of parenthood is this:

    Everything changes, good or bad.

    I cling to that scratchy-ass rope for dear life more than I care to admit.
    Julie´s last blog post ..Flew scare

    | August 26, 2010 @ 4:48 pm

  26. Robin said,

    Wow. If I had seen this, I would’ve suggested Melatonin… as it is my favorite go to sleep fixer…So glad its working!

    | September 4, 2010 @ 4:10 am

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