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Stood Up

I got stood up today. I was going to lunch at 12:30 at a restaurant near my house that has a kickass ahi salad.It was a business lunch and anyone with small children and no real “outside of the house” work to speak of would understand the excitment I felt at needing to be somewhere at a certain time to meet a person who would more than likely be paying for my meal.

In my anticipation of being out in public, I slapped on some whore paint and left the sweats on the bedroom floor opting for a pair of minimally dirty black pants instead. I had something to do from 10:30 to 11:30 which involved talking about not drinking with a group of other people who love to talk about not drinking and then I headed straight over. I had an insanely bad migraine though so I stopped by my house where my husband met me in the driveway with some Imitrex and a glass of water (as if I were running a marathon and was there to cheer me along my route) and still I still made it through the front doors of the Coral Tree Cafe (did I mention they have an insanely delightful ahi salad?) with two minutes to spare.

My date was not there yet. No big deal I thought. I’ll just sidle up to the counter area and pretend to read a magazine for a few minutes. I flipped though an entire LA Weeky, glancing up every twenty seconds for my date until I finally got to the ads for sex phone lines on the back page. I looked at my watch; seven minutes had passed.

I was already starting to miss my sweatpants and I’d only been out of the house an hour and a half. I knew I was going to have to work up more endurance for social situations. I want to be the Tiger Woods of lunching. Wait…

I burned off another ten minutes fidgeting with my Blackberry and then another five studying the menu from a seat at a table even though I already knew I’d be getting that damn salad (It’s ahi. Seared. Ginger garlic dressing.)

If a person is over fifteen minutes late and another person is really hungry it seems acceptable for the hungry, not late person to go ahead and order right? So I ordered my salad and diet Coke and then sat back down and attempted to look normal and non-stood up while trying to avoid the pitying glances I was positive I was getting. (Yes I know that no one gave a shit what I was doing but I still felt self conscious)

At this point it was pretty clear that I was getting stood up and I didn’t have my date’s phone number or email address on me. I decided to call my husband because a) it helped me look busy and b) he’s great in a crisis. “If someone is driving from the Pacific Palisades to Encino how much leeway do I need to give them before I get the hell out of here?” I asked him. “Oh, and factor in my headache please.”

“Thirty-five minutes.” he answered immediately. I know. He’s really smart. He should work for some sort of crisis hot line. Or do underwear ads. Either way.

This left me with ten minutes to wait. I spent five more minutes idly sipping my soda, mentally shoe shopping based on what other people were wearing and comparing my twins’ temperament to the badly behaved toddlers running around (full disclosure: my twins have never been to a restaurant). Finally I went to the counter and asked if they could change my order to go and went home, stripped and watched a 20/20 about a guy who poisoned his wife with antifreeze hidden in Gatorade until my headache went away.

So, turns out that my lunch date got confused on the time and showed up at noon waiting 28 min and left. We rescheduled for Monday the 18th. I’ve already chosen an outfit.

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on January 7, 2010 12:17 amUncategorized27 comments  

27 Comments

  1. Anonymous said,

    Was the person important enough to have made it worth your while to call the person while you were waiting to understand why he or she had not shown up? Sure beats feeling sorry for one's self.

    | January 7, 2010 @ 1:58 am

  2. Anne Marie said,

    Sorry I stood you up. Ha!….couldn't resist that line.
    But really, I think you'd be one of the coolest cats to have the 'I actually get to get out of the house and am expected to be somewhere' lunch with. Their loss!!

    | January 7, 2010 @ 2:00 am

  3. abdpbt said,

    People are assholes. At least you got your salad.

    | January 7, 2010 @ 2:03 am

  4. Sarah said,

    I've never been stood up before, but I have had to sit alone in a restaurant and I hated it. It made it worse that the hostess sat me in an empty section, so I looked like even more of a loser than I already was. Still it sucks when someone says they will do something, then don't follow through.

    | January 7, 2010 @ 2:06 am

  5. Aunt Becky said,

    I've never been stood up. Wait…no. But I'm pretty sure I will be one of these days.

    | January 7, 2010 @ 2:11 am

  6. feefifoto said,

    Did you ever find out why they never showed?

    | January 7, 2010 @ 2:24 am

  7. Marinka said,

    Of course everyone was looking at you with pitying glances. They only want you to think that they didn't care. But they did. Oh, they did.

    | January 7, 2010 @ 2:39 am

  8. Anonymous said,

    If you would all read the entire post, you would see there was a misunderstanding!

    | January 7, 2010 @ 2:42 am

  9. Anonymous said,

    I agree, read the entire post, it states why she didn't call (she didn't have the number) and it states that there was a time mix up (re: reason they didn't show)!
    Anyways, I enjoyed this post! All of it. Ha!
    Melanie

    | January 7, 2010 @ 4:18 am

  10. Ellie said,

    I can't even stand to wait like three minutes for someone. I feel like i have a siren on my head blaring "LOOOOOSER!". I do the phone fiddle, sometimes even pretend to talk to someone on it just to look important. That was fun the one time it rang while I was pretending to blather away on it… then I really WAS getting those pitying glances…

    | January 7, 2010 @ 4:19 am

  11. heather... said,

    My shrink stood me up TWICE this week. What. The. Fuck.

    | January 7, 2010 @ 4:26 am

  12. KRM said,

    but really, how was the salad?

    | January 7, 2010 @ 4:57 am

  13. Anne Marie said,

    I swear those last 2 sentences weren't there ~3 hours ago!..;)

    | January 7, 2010 @ 5:57 am

  14. Keltie said,

    Yep, I work from home too and fully understand the sweats and whore paint!!

    | January 7, 2010 @ 6:11 am

  15. Piccinigirl said,

    happens to ME all the time! LOL

    glad you know what you're wearing for the next date. 😉

    | January 7, 2010 @ 2:51 pm

  16. Shannon said,

    Next time you see him/her, bitch slap them! No one should make the Steph waiting!! Thank God you don't rink…you would have been losing it on that one! Does Jon model underwear? That would be a good cover for your next book! Hell yeah!

    | January 7, 2010 @ 3:06 pm

  17. Anonymous said,

    That salad sounds great:)
    YUM…

    | January 7, 2010 @ 3:35 pm

  18. inannasstar said,

    I can sympathize with the whole missing the sweatpants line. I LIVE in yoga pants almost daily (too bad I only practice once or twice a month) and when I have to get dressed up in jeans it's torture.

    I love your writing and look forward to reading more.

    | January 7, 2010 @ 4:53 pm

  19. Rebecca said,

    That reminds me of the time I used to go 'cruising' and would pass by hoards of guys and say "Meet me at Taco Bell in 10 min" and then I'd go to the upper parking lot of a shopping center where I could see a line of cars all pull into Taco Bell. Epic!

    But seriously……I went to the website for Coral Tree Cafe and they charge $1.25 for a tomato…slice??? Wow! Must be some good tomatoes!!! Can you order their baked mac n cheese and blog about how good it is for me? Sounds delicious!

    | January 7, 2010 @ 7:43 pm

  20. Wishing 4 One said,

    Try always being stood and thats when you make appointments for any.thing.at.all here! Your doctor can stand you right up and not show while you are waiting in their friggen office! It does suck, but you get used to it. Sort of. Ok you never get used to it. It blows. Damn that salad sounds tasty.

    | January 7, 2010 @ 9:39 pm

  21. AmandaP said,

    Isn't it beyond terrible that we as a society are so uncomfortable being alone in public.

    I for one can hardly stand it :)

    | January 7, 2010 @ 10:02 pm

  22. Kizz said,

    You got bitches fighting on your blog! Sweet.

    | January 7, 2010 @ 11:14 pm

  23. With Love, From The Mother 'Hood said,

    Love when people think they are being really ballsy leaving comments, but don't have the balls to leave them as anything other than "anonymous" – you ROCK, bitch!
    Missy

    | January 8, 2010 @ 5:34 am

  24. Caroline said,

    So glad it was all a big misunderstanding and that it worked out for you guys to try again later!!!

    | January 8, 2010 @ 7:02 am

  25. Jennie said,

    I want that salad. Now that Chili My Soul is closed I need a new go-to place when I'm visiting my parents in Encino. I know there is more to this story, but you had me at ahi tuna.

    | January 9, 2010 @ 6:34 am

  26. Kendra said,

    I would have been so upset! Good for you for holding it together and for your husband for being so ready with an answer!

    I'm glad it was innocent and that you're trying again. And that salad sounds amazing. I'm glad you still got to eat that!

    | January 9, 2010 @ 9:15 pm

  27. Anonymous said,

    Yumm. I love Coral Tree Cafe. Now I am hungry. damn.

    | January 11, 2010 @ 11:21 pm

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