This post is about a day ahead of being newsworthy but tomorrow is a long awaited appointment for Sadie at Children’s Hospital in Los Angeles. If you’ve never heard of Children’s Hospital, it’s this major pediatric facility a ton of medical billing workers that’s won a bajillion awards for, you know, doing leading things and discovering…I don’t know…I’m not a goddamned brochure okay but just know the place is good. And we’re lucky as hell to have gotten an appointment.
The thing is, Sadie has been doing well with her weight lately. She’s stepped up her eating from dust balls on the floor mixed with an ounce or two of Pediasure and give or take a half a piece of cheese to human sized meals that contain protein, carbs and yummy, yummy GoGurt (see carbs). She’s been eating so well, in fact, that we haven’t fed her with the tube in well over a month and she’s still managed to gain almost a pound. Remember that post where I had stopped tube feeding her and she lost weight? Well, she finally broke twenty pounds (give or take an ounce or two depending on whether she’s sweated through a tough workout or pigged out on a half a hot dog) due to kick ass parenting (fine, periactin) and we’re pretty pleased with her progress weight wise. Unfortunately, she’s still only 29 inches tall. Think about that for a minute. She’s the size of two 12 inch subs end to end plus a few extra bites. She’s a small fry (but the smallest fry in the bag is still delicious). One would hope that when one gains weight one would eventually gain height as well but with Sadie, hope and a growth chart has gotten us a much coveted appointment with Children’s.
Our pediatrician took one look at her at our last visit and said, “Yeah, I have no doubt she’ll need growth hormones.” I don’t know what that entails or whether or not what he says is golden -he’s a crackerjack doctor but he doesn’t believe that teething causes symptoms in babies which any mom can tell you is a load of shit so I don’t know how much I can invest in his growth hormones theory.
One thing that’s fun about having a short stack is she’s good for party tricks. I love the look on people’s faces when they see what looks to be an 11-month-old baby walk up and say “high five!” although they could be staring because high fives are so out. Maybe they’re thinking “Can’t you teach the poor kid a fist bump?” Well, that’s something we can work on during the 2 to 3 hour wait at the hospital tomorrow. I’ll let you know how it goes.