Archive for March, 2008
Even though I’m still really tired (I’m having trouble believing there will come a day when I don’t feel wish I were Rip Van Winkle) I’d be remiss if I didn’t tell you about my quick trip to NYC.
I won’t bore you with the details of my anxiety due to “not packing until five minutes before I had to leave” or my trials and tribulations of “staying up with the babies the night before” instead I will jump to the part where I sat down on the plane in Economy and immediatey ordered a celebratory Mimosa to mark my first time alone in… ever. I was informed that champagne is “for first class passengers only” so I had to settle for a Heineken light. Then I finished the last forty or so pages of the book I was reading Easy by Emma Gold (sort of like a raunchier funnier Bridget Jones) and then bored my seatmate with stories about my crying twins for the rest of the trip. Yeah, I’ve become that person – the one you may not want to sit next to on a plane – even without the baby.
I arrived at my hotel and was checked in by a guy with a sexy Scottish accent who sounded exactly like my favorite actor John Hannah – sure some may love their John Travolta or Tom Cruise – I’m in love with “the guy from Four Weddings and a Funeral who read the poem and the one in Sliding Doors that Gwyneth Paltrow ends up with.” That was probably the highlight of the evening because I was tired…have I mentioned in the last paragraph or so my TIREDNESS?
Next morning I went to the Today Show, and then straight afterward, headed to my publishing company to harrass everyone and check my email. Many of my friends (ones I know in person and virtual – so hi if that was you) had emailed me to say congratulations and that they thought I did a good job which was so nice…but one email kind of stood out from the rest – the one that said just this: “You sound like a judgemental bitch. I feel sorry for your three daughters and I hope you’re saving up for therapy.” At least they got right to the point. Yes, some people like to hate for no apparent reason. I can’t really imagine having that strong a reaction to my interview but…bless their little heart! Judging people is something I do very well – kind of a natural talent and it’s nice to get noticed for something that comes so easy!
After a quick meal, I ran across the street and dished about the website Miss Bimbo with Neil Cavuto on Fox News. It was so fun I almost became a Republican!
And then it was back to my Economy seat for the long flight home. Knowing ahead of time that “Champagne is for closers” I waited until I scoped out the coolest seeming flight attendant and asked them to sneak me a Mimosa. Which they did! Thank you! And then for the first time ever, I slept on an airplane.
Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on March 27, 2008 5:01 am
Okay, last one, for this week, I promise. But my new friend Heather and founder of a very cool site called Babyshrink is posting an interview with me starting tomorrow (Monday). I will be on a plane but it will warm my heart to know you’re all reading my inner thoughts and discovering a great and informative down to earth site which answers great questions about what’s going on with our children. Let’s help her make her site a huge success!!
Thanks Heather! You rock!
Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on March 24, 2008 4:50 am
Today me and my friend Kizzy loaded up the car (fine, minivan) with children, pretzel goldfish, juice boxes, a change of shoes for some reason, sweaters, a camera and Easter baskets to head out to the Descano Garden for the egg hunt to end all egg hunts. This thing was known throughout the LA area to be spectacular. A few things we forgot: sunscreen and a flask. Yeah, it kind of sucked. First off, it was advertised as 4 dollars for the kids which includes a basket for a 45 minutes egg hunt. Not bad, right? Uh, you’d be wrong. It was 7 bucks just to enter the gardens and the line was longer than to get into Disneyland. Then it was another 4 for the basket but the kids were only allowed to pick up 5 eggs. In 45 minutes. Listen, if your kid can spend 45 minutes finding 5 eggs which are just thrown haphazardly on a lawn, I think you have bigger problems than the price of admission. I think you need a tutor. But more unappealing than the 5 egg limit was the 2 hour wait for the privilege of finding 5 eggs. Yes, the 9:30, 10:15, and 11 o’clock were sold out. The only tour left was the 11:45. Naturally we didn’t find this out until we reached the front of the line to buy tickets -which I bought but promptly resold to an unsuspecting family at the back of the line when I realized that I’d never survive the heat until 11:45.
Now, at this point, I just wanted to go home but Kizzy and I had children with us. Children who wanted to see the Easter bunny dammit! So see the Easter Bunny they did.
I think my daughter will be permanently cured of any interest in future Easter bunnies.
Does anyone else get the feeling that this “Easter Bunny” is mandated to register it’s whereabouts with the state every year?
This photo is courtesy of Kizz by the way.
Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on March 22, 2008 8:24 pm
Hey, two posts in one day! To what do you owe this honor? Glad you asked. A good friend of mine works on a nationally syndicated talk show. One I happen to watch – a lot. He is looking for moms in the NY, NJ or CT area who are sort of germ freaks. You know who you are, moms. I know a lot of moms like that here in LA (you too know who you are) but none on the other coast. It would be great if your husband thinks you’re a little nutty about it.
He needs to book this asap so if you are interested (and I will offer up a very close friendship with me – OR the last Ding Dong in my pantry – whichever interests you more) please call 646-638-5612 or email firstname.lastname@example.org.
It will be really fun! And you’ll get a limo and food. Do it!
Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on March 20, 2008 10:37 pm
First off, thanks for all the nice comments. I’ve been feeling particularly like I’m going crazy from sleep deprivation mixed with worry mixed with Elby’s school taking off waaay too many holidays. Why do the kids need spring vacation? Vacation from what exactly? Is painting a paper plate, socializing at the water table and learning a cute yoga pose so taxing that they need to chill out for a few weeks in front of Elmo? Elby’s about to get reacquainted with some old friends of hers on Noggin. Bring out the beanbag chair, pour yourself some juice and prepare to be entertained old school style cause I’m just not as exciting as preschool. Oh well.
So in the midst of this insanity, I’m off to NY on Monday and appearing on the Today Show Tuesday morning. I don’t know what time. I don’t know who’s interviewing me but I’m hoping it’s the love of my life Tiki Barber. I doubt it will be though because I believe the people at the Today Show are plotting to keep us apart. They know that Tiki’s love for me is so strong that he may find it just too damn hard to resist me. And they have a point. I don’t want to spend my whole appearance just telling Tiki, “listen, I know you’re obsessed with me despite the fact that I’m 41, I drive a minivan and I have three kids…okay and a husband, but you have to try to maintain your composure!”
But I painfully digress. The point is, if you want to see what four months post twins on no sleep looks like, tune in. It will make me feel better knowing that my virtual friends are rooting for me to be funny despite my current circumstances!
Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on 7:02 pm