ABOUT CONSULTING WATCH! ARCHIVES CONTACT SUBSCRIBE

Pinot Grigio and self reflection. Not the best combo.

Hi fellow bloggers! What the fuck is going on? I haven’t blogged in awhile. It’s a Saturday night and I’m home alone because my husband is on a business trip. He’s been gone since Tuesday early morning. He won’t be back until next Wednesday. That’s a lot of one on one time with my child. And my demons. Can I just say to the other mothers who read this blog, sometimes I love my baby girl with a ferocity that scares me. I want to inhale her, kiss her to death, protect her with such a primal instinct I don’t even know where it comes from. BUT at the same time, starting at about 4:00 pm. the countdown begins for bedtime. Sometimes and hour with her is like stairmaster time. It just hangs there in space taunting me with the microwave clock, “ha ha, you thought an hour had passed by but it’s only been 15 minutes! HA.”

Okay, on to more important issues. Yesterday I was in the gym and I was confronted with so much nudity that I’m still feeling a little scarred. Like, I get it. You’re in a women’s locker room so you think to yourself “hey, we’re all girls here. Let’s just be naked and go about all of our normal activities.” But here’s the thing. I DON’T KNOW YOU. I don’t want to see your pubic hair just wandering around fishing something out of your locker. Cause that’s all you become to me is a patch of pubic hair. I know this is even a hack subject at this point and a lot of us feel this way. But let’s delve a bit deeper shall we? Is this some sort of defiance? Does the 60 year old woman who stands on the scale for 15 minutes just trying to get her exact weight in ounces want me to look away or want me to check her out in all her glory? I don’t know the answer but I don’t like it. Honestly, I’m not uncomfortable with my body. I don’t mind being naked in front of my friends if I’m say, trying on a bra or changing into a swim suit. You know, normal reasons for getting naked but just parading around? No.

Another gym thing is people with their cell phones. Like you can’t go 30 minutes on the precor machine without rolling calls? Get your shit together. Maybe you need a personal assistant. I don’t know but stop taking phone calls. It bothers me. And one more thing. Men who crazily grunt as they lift weights. “Hey, note to you: the weights are too heavy. Go a little lighter and you won’t have to sound like you’re taking a dump.”

I guess in retrospect, this wasn’t self reflection as much as harsh judgement about other people. Oh well, there’s always tomorrow.

Posted by Stefanie Wilder Taylor on March 19, 2006 4:20 amUncategorized12 comments  

12 Comments

  1. MrsFortune said,

    Wow, I have long been thinking about how to post my thoughts on the very same things at my gym! Especially the cell phone thing. WTF? Also at my gym they have these HUGE signs EVERYWHERE that say “no opposite sex children in the locker room” (they have a family changing room for that) but some dumbass always has to bring their 5-6 year old son in there. Hello???? Grrr….

    | March 19, 2006 @ 8:25 pm

  2. Denial said,

    Wow, this place you call a GYM sounds interesting. :)

    | March 19, 2006 @ 10:26 pm

  3. Jess Riley said,

    See, this is why I take my chances at home with The FIRM workout tapes. Yes, I said TAPES because I am a huge nerd and I’m also too cheap to upgrade to DVDs. I’m a cheapass nerd.

    (Glen Campbell…hehehe!!!)

    | March 19, 2006 @ 11:37 pm

  4. sweatpantsmom said,

    You’ve just laid out all the reasons I quit going to the gym.

    I mean, the fact that I don’t like to exercise had nothing to do with it.

    | March 20, 2006 @ 9:32 am

  5. kati said,

    My husband claims he is on a business trip, too. “Business trip”…yeah, right. It’s a vacation!

    I love my little girl to pieces, too, especially when she’s in bed at 8pm (because I was ready for it by 6pm the latest).

    | March 20, 2006 @ 5:03 pm

  6. IzzyMom said,

    What is this thing you call a “gym”?

    Just kidding. I have a passing acquaintance with gyms but it’s so inconvenient and then there’s the whole weird, naked people/pubes ahoy thing….I’d rather work out at home, I think.

    | March 20, 2006 @ 7:13 pm

  7. IzzyMom said,

    And bedtime countdowns are a parental tradition. Anyone who says they don’t live for bedtime probably has a nanny.

    | March 20, 2006 @ 7:15 pm

  8. Alexa said,

    Ah, don’t worry, I am always up for a little harsh judgement of other people. And the gym-grunting drives me out of my mind. Also? If you are sweating enough on the treadmill that drops of sweat are flying furiously from your hair onto people across the room? You have probably worked out enough for now.

    | March 20, 2006 @ 9:54 pm

  9. willowfae said,

    I’m totally with you on the countdown to bedtime. We have naptime countdown too on the weekends. I love my 3 year old the most in 2 or 3 hour increments- more than that and I get very impatient with him. I’m embarrassed about that, but it’s true. I think I work as much for my sanity as I do the money.

    | March 22, 2006 @ 4:38 am

  10. Lena said,

    Thanks Stefanie! This is my new excuse why I haven’t gotten my ass to the gym in a week. On principle that the phones and nudity and grunting are offensive damnit!

    Also, be glad you’re seeing hair if you know what I mean. And I think you do…

    | March 22, 2006 @ 8:54 am

  11. Mrs. Chicky said,

    Your post reminded me why I don’t go to the gym anymore! Well, the pubic hair, the cell phones, and the fact that I hate to exercise.

    And I thought I was the only one who started the bedtime countdown at 4pm!

    | March 22, 2006 @ 2:34 pm

  12. Anonymous said,

    This is very interesting site…
    »

    | August 16, 2006 @ 2:29 am

RSS feed for comments on this post

Subscribe

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

peel n stick customized labels

use the code babyonbored and save 10%


Gummi Bears Should Not Be Organic: And Other Opinions I Can't Back Up With Facts
Buy the Book:

Amazon

Barnes and Noble

iBooks

I'm Kind of a Big Deal
Read an Excerpt!
Buy the Book:
Amazon | B & N

It's Not Me It's You
Read an Excerpt!
Buy the Book:
Amazon | B & N

Naptime is the New Happy Hour
Read an Excerpt!

Buy the Book:
Amazon | B & N

Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay
Read an Excerpt!

Buy the Book:
Amazon | B & N